The Colbert Report
Pope TBD & Souvenir Sales
Season 9 • 02/28/2013
The world is officially popeless, so vendors try to move a ton of old Benedict XVI merchandise.
The Colbert ReportS9 John Kerry's Dumb Talk
Secretary of State John Kerry travels to nine nations, champions free speech and invents the country "Kyrzakhstan," a mix between Kyrgyzstan and Kazakhstan.
The Colbert ReportS9 Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's Trial at Gitmo - Neal Katyal
The former Acting Solicitor General talks about the U.S. justice system, courtroom bugging and the future of Guantanamo Bay.
The Colbert ReportS9 Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's Trial at Gitmo
Guantanamo Bay hosts a one-of-a-kind military tribunal, designed by President Bush, implemented by President Obama, and inspired by President Kafka.
The Colbert ReportS9 Halls Mentho-Lyptus Cough Drops
Stephen files paperwork to change Jay the Intern's name to "Halls Mentho-Lyptus with Triple Soothing Action Presents Jay the Intern."
The Colbert ReportS9 Intro - 2/27/13
A Gitmo inmate goes on trial, John Kerry replaces Hillary Clinton, and MoMA curator Paola Antonelli joins Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS9 Budget Sequestration
Because Democrats and Republicans failed to reach an agreement over the debt ceiling, Obama's sequester will cripple programs that both sides love.
The Colbert ReportS9 Intro - 2/28/13
Pope Benedict XVI fulfills his last day in office, the sequester hangs over America, and speechwriter Jon Favreau discusses working for Barack Obama.
The Colbert ReportS9 Jon Favreau
President Obama's former speechwriter talks about his collaborative writing process and the importance of storytelling versus sound bites.
The Colbert ReportS9 Colbert Report Consumer Alert - Demonic Goodwill Items
According to Pat Robertson, evil spirits are suckers for secondhand rayon slacks, broken blenders and classic albums like Ken Snyder's "By Request Only."
The Colbert ReportS9 Pope TBD & Souvenir Sales
Tailors make three different vestments to fit any incoming papal body shape, and Pope Benedict XVI memorabilia sales skyrocket in Vatican City.
The Colbert ReportS9 The Enemy Within - Dr. Skylar Bayer
A lonely lady scientist studies the reproductive success of Maine scallops by cutting off their balls.
The Colbert ReportS9 Sequestration & Obama's Sci-Fi Flub
The federal government goes on a diet by shaving off two percent everywhere, and President Obama mixes up "Star Wars" and "Star Trek."
The Colbert ReportS9 Kirk Bloodsworth
Witness to Innocence's advocacy director, Kirk Bloodsworth, discusses DNA evidence testing for death row inmates and his quest to abolish the death penalty.
The Colbert ReportS9 Texas Gun Training Bill & Free Shotgun Experiment
Representative Dan Flynn wants to trim gun training hours from 10 to four, and grad student Kyle Coplen concocts a social experiment with more guns.
The Colbert ReportS9 Obama's Israel Trip
Obama tries to wipe out his shameful record of never visiting Israel by visiting Israel, even though it could be awkward with Romney-fan Benjamin Netanyahu.
The Colbert ReportS9 Obama's Israel Trip - Michael Oren
The Israeli Ambassador to the United States talks about Chuck Hagel's Israel comments and Iran's nuclear position.
The Colbert ReportS9 Dennis Tito's Mars Flyby Mission
Millionaire space tourist Dennis Tito will send a married couple to Mars for the noblest reason there is: impatience.
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