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The Colbert Report
Intro - 1/8/13
Season 9 • 01/08/2013
Scientists study longevity, a Bin Laden film spurs controversy, and Chris Kluwe backs gay rights.
More
Watching
05:30
The Colbert Report
S9
Blood in the Water - Bill O'Reilly's Racial Insensitivity
Wikipedia's elephants page has more protection than elephants, and the liberal media twists Bill O'Reilly's compliment about Asians.
01/07/2013
04:59
The Colbert Report
S9
Jimmy Wales
Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales explains operating costs, censorship in China and the budding Wikivoyager.
01/07/2013
00:07
The Colbert Report
S9
Sign Off - Goodnight
Stephen says goodnight.
01/07/2013
02:44
The Colbert Report
S9
Fiscal Cliff Deal & Disincentives
Republicans accept President Obama's tax hikes on the wealthy, but luckily this horrible deal contains a few loopholes.
01/07/2013
02:53
The Colbert Report
S9
Stephen's Holiday Break
Stephen spends the first six days of vacation just going to the bathroom.
01/07/2013
07:05
The Colbert Report
S9
Cheating Death - Rage & Blood Transfusions
People naturally blessed with soul-choking bitterness live longer than the terminally calm, and drinking young blood is a great alternative to exercising.
01/08/2013
04:08
The Colbert Report
S9
Bin Laden Film Controversy
Since America is long overdue for a thorough investigation into its use of torture in movies, the Senate Intelligence Committee goes after "Zero Dark Thirty."
01/08/2013
05:58
The Colbert Report
S9
Chris Kluwe
Chris Kluwe explains the punter's role and reiterates his support for pro-gay Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo.
01/08/2013
02:27
The Colbert Report
S9
Postage Price Hike
The USPS Forever Stamp goes up by one penny, which proves the government can't do anything right.
01/08/2013
00:13
The Colbert Report
S9
Sign Off - VACSA-TERN
Stephen sips on the blood of the young and admires himself in the mirror.
01/08/2013
00:38
The Colbert Report
S9
Intro - 1/8/13
Science finds the key to a long, healthy life, "Zero Dark Thirty" stirs up controversy, and NFL punter Chris Kluwe discusses gay rights advocacy.
01/08/2013
05:19
The Colbert Report
S9
Neil Shubin
The biological scientist shares his book, "The Universe Within: Discovering the Common History of Rocks, Planets, and People."
01/09/2013
04:51
The Colbert Report
S9
Gun Control Backlash
Schools work armed officers into their prom themes, and former NRA President Marion Hammer knows that outlawing assault weapons is just another form of discrimination.
01/09/2013
00:32
The Colbert Report
S9
Intro - 1/9/13
America considers gun control, a troubling food addiction surfaces, and paleontologist Neil Shubin finds the missing link between sea and land creatures.
01/09/2013
03:38
The Colbert Report
S9
Idaho's Walled & Armed Community
An exciting real estate opportunity boasts family shooting ranges, a firearms factory and safety from federal thugs.
01/09/2013
00:09
The Colbert Report
S9
Sign Off - McGnaw the Gluten-Free Beaver
Stephen says goodnight and gnaws on McGnaw's piece of wood.
01/09/2013
06:18
The Colbert Report
S9
Thought for Food - Wheat Addictions
America gets hooked on a new substance that's just as addictive as crack: a loaf of bread.
01/09/2013
03:00
The Colbert Report
S9
Roadside Sofa Boning
A 46-year-old man is arrested for having sex with a couch, so public schools start teaching safe sex with plastic slipcovers.
01/10/2013
03:43
The Colbert Report
S9
Benjamin Gibbard
The lead singer of Death Cab for Cutie discusses his relatively universal solo album, "Former Lives."
01/10/2013
05:19
The Colbert Report
S9
Obama's Failed Second Term
President Obama is turning out the way white males wanted him to, and Jack Lew's sloppy signature will make America's currency a laughingstock.
01/10/2013
04:36
The Colbert Report
S9
Tip/Wag - HAPIfork & Kevin Garnett
A consumer technology keeps people from consuming, and Kevin Garnett dishes out some Hefty brand trash talk.
01/10/2013
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South Park
S26
Brace Yourself for New South Park Adventures
Cartman, Stan, Kyle and Kenny are back for a new season of South Park, premiering Wednesday, February 8, at 10/9c.
01/23/2023
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Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack
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10/12/2022