The Colbert Report
Ryan Seacrest's Shark Attack
Season 4 • 08/04/2008
We must discourage sharks from eating television celebrities.
Thanks to the GuestsThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen thanks his guests Brendan Koerner and Buzz Aldrin.
Buzz AldrinThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen asks Buzz Aldrin if "Fly Me to the Moon" -- his new animated film about flies on the Apollo mission -- is based on a true story.
Brendan KoernerThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen wants Brendan Koerner to tell him why they make fluorescent light bulbs look like soft serve ice cream if you're not supposed to lick them.
Starbucks Cuts JobsThe Colbert ReportS4
The economic downturn is hitting Starbucks right in the Fresh Roast beans.
Cheating Death - Swimming SafetyThe Colbert ReportS4
Who is pooping in our pools? Stephen's guess is the elusive Poopacabra.
Intro - 7/31/08The Colbert ReportS4
How to be environmentally correct -- step one: don't tell the environment it has a nice rack.
Intro - 8/4/08The Colbert ReportS4
Stephen examines John McCain's latest campaign commercial. Good news: it's a talkie.
The Word - We the PeopleThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen already knew he'd never vote for Obama, but he didn't realize how much he'd love to vote for Britney Spears.
Democrats' Five-Week RecessThe Colbert ReportS4
The do-nothing Democrats in Congress begin a five-week recess. If they're not passing bills, what is the president supposed to veto?
Lucas ConleyThe Colbert ReportS4
Lucas Conley tells Stephen about America's obsession with branding in his Dr. Pepper interview.
Ryan Seacrest's Shark AttackThe Colbert ReportS4
Now that the shark has had a taste of Ryan Seacrest, it's only a matter of time before they come looking for Stephen.
Obsessive Compulsive ChecklistThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen wants you to make sure you turned off the stove, closed the refrigerator door, and locked the doors before bed.
Canton, Kansas ApologyThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen hopes Canton, Kansas accepts his apology because America's real assberg is Canton, South Dakota.
Obama's Energy Plan - Tire GaugesThe Colbert ReportS4
To highlight what a charade proper air pressure is, the McCain campaign hands out "Obama Energy Plan" tire gauges.
David CarrThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen asks David Carr which is more damaging to society -- crack addiction or the New York Times.
The Word - Divided We WinThe Colbert ReportS4
Congressional Republicans should think about making Corinthian columns a wedge issue.
Starbucks PromotionThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen is selling counterfeit Starbucks receipts for any date you want.
Intro - 8/5/08The Colbert ReportS4
The solution to the fuel crisis may be just around the corner. God, Stephen hopes it's a gas station.
Spida of Love - Jason BondThe Colbert ReportS4
Stephen asks Jason Bond if his spider would win in a fight with Neil Young's spider.
Spanish AudioThe Colbert ReportS4
If you were listening to the Spanish audio of tonight's broadcast, Stephen wants to see your green card.
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