The Colbert Report

The Word - No Regrets

Season 3 • 07/25/2007

Stephen feels so strongly about tonight's word, he got it tattooed on his arm.

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04:08

The Word - Modest Porpoisal
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Stephen suggests that by eating endangered animals we can prevent their extinction.
07/24/2007
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04:20

Movies That Are Destroying America: Chuck and Larry
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Stephen just hopes that "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry" shows the dark side of gay marriage: Kevin James naked.
07/24/2007
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01:52

Bush's Butt
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If the Bush administration is so secretive, would they have publicly handed over power to Dick Cheney while the president got a camera stuck up his butt?
07/24/2007
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01:43

Joining the Illuminati
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Stephen tried every crazy handshake he could think of when he met President Bush.
07/24/2007
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00:30

Intro - 7/24/07
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Stephen discusses a scandal in the German zoo system, talks about the summer blockbuster season and interviews executive director of the ACLU, Anthony Romero.
07/24/2007
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00:32

Intro - 7/25/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Scientists develop a removable tattoo, Fred Thompson demotes his campaign manager, and Stephen asks Charles Kaiser if there's a gay Superman.
07/25/2007
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01:33

Thompson Campaign
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes America deserves a president who is ready to roll up his sleeves and get to work on a 52-ounce porterhouse.
07/25/2007
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02:46

Hometown Hero Town - Bryce Canyon City
The Colbert ReportS3

In order to establish Colbert Report City, the show will now be taped in Utah. Go Jazz!
07/25/2007
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06:00

Daily Kos
The Colbert ReportS3

Hey New York Times -- Stephen didn't spoil Harry Potter for you, don't ruin the war in Iraq for him.
07/25/2007
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05:21

Charles Kaiser
The Colbert ReportS3

When Charles Kaiser suggests that New York is a gay metropolis because of critical mass, Stephen understands that to mean it's like a dangerous nuclear bomb.
07/25/2007
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03:40

The Word - No Regrets
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes that you should never regret a decision but instead get it tattooed on your forehead.
07/25/2007
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00:32

Intro - 7/26/07
The Colbert ReportS3

North Dakota seeks to legalize hemp farming, a goddess is stripped of her title, and Stephen asks Robert Shrum whether he advised Kerry to flip or to flop.
07/26/2007
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06:32

Bob Shrum
The Colbert ReportS3

Democratic campaign strategist Bob Shrum wants to know if Stephen's wrist injury has made him reconsider his position on universal health care.
07/26/2007
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06:04

Industrial Hemp & Medical Marijuana - Aaron Houston
The Colbert ReportS3

Medical marijuana advocate Aaron Houston tells Stephen the only thing you'd get from smoking hemp is the headache of your life.
07/26/2007
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03:22

Advice to the Gods - Nepalese Pre-Teen Goddesses
The Colbert ReportS3

A top Kumari -- a pre-teen girl Nepalese Buddhists worship as a goddess -- was recently stripped of her divinity for visiting the United States.
07/26/2007
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03:35

How Did Stephen Break His Wrist?
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's left wrist is in a cast, though there's some confusion about what might have caused the injury.
07/26/2007
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02:51

Wrist Violence - Glorification
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen dispels the rumor that he injured his wrist while punching out Korean strongman Kim Jong-il.
07/30/2007
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05:29

Evan Osnos
The Colbert ReportS3

Chicago Tribune's Beijing Bureau Chief, Evan Osnos, argues that the American demand for cashmere has caused pollution clouds to travel from China to American soil.
07/30/2007
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05:24

ThreatDown - Scottish Surgeons
The Colbert ReportS3

Thanks to Scottish surgeons, the only way America can protect its ports is by crossbreeding dolphins with Homeland Security director Michael Chertoff.
07/30/2007
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02:48

The Word - Solidarity
The Colbert ReportS3

By hiring the homeless to picket for them, carpenters are protesting low wages and no benefits with low wages and no benefits.
07/30/2007
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02:55

Pollution Immigration
The Colbert ReportS3

Polluted air from Asia, or "kung fumes," are taking away emphysema-related deaths from hardworking American pollutants.
07/30/2007
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