The Colbert Report
God's Pet Chimp
Season 3 E 52 • 04/19/2007
Human DNA has stopped evolving because God got us right the first time when he intelligently designed us.

Watching

05:23
The Colbert ReportS3 E3
Tek Jansen - Hounds of Hell: Ragtime Billy Peaches
In this episode, Tek Jansen is mysteriously teleported to the combatosphere orbiting over Asteroid Z.
01/10/2007
00:28
The Colbert ReportS3 E4
Intro - 1/11/07
Stephen sends a monogrammed waterboard to Guantanamo for its fifth anniversary.
01/11/2007
05:43
The Colbert ReportS3 E4
Ken Roth
On the fifth anniversary of Guantanamo Bay, Human Rights Watch executive director Ken Roth joins Stephen.
01/11/2007
06:48
The Colbert ReportS3 E4
Judy Woodruff
Judy Woodruff talks about her new PBS documentary on Generation Next and grills Stephen on his tattoos.
01/11/2007
04:02
The Colbert ReportS3 E4
Tip/Wag - Science and Technology
Stephen is outraged by the iPhone unless he gets one for free.
01/11/2007
03:28
The Colbert ReportS3 E4
What Number Is Stephen Thinking Of? - Doubled Up
Stephen reminds his viewers that just because the numbers on the board are between one and five hundred, that doesn't mean the number he's thinking of is.
01/11/2007
02:25
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
Inspired by Dr. King
Stephen calls for a national lie-in. It's time to go beyond passive resistance to pure passiveness.
01/15/2007
06:04
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
Bears & Balls - Gas
Buy gas! It's a sure-fire commodity with no risk except for the sure risk of fire.
01/15/2007
02:40
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
A Man's Touch
It's insensitive to remind Condoleezza Rice that she's going to die without knowing a man's touch.
01/15/2007
04:45
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
Alex Kuczynski
Alex Kuczynski explains why we don't look better after spending $15 billion on plastic surgery.
01/15/2007
00:32
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
Intro - 1/15/07
Stephen discusses plastic surgery with author Alex Kuczynski and debuts his new financial segment.
01/15/2007
03:29
The Colbert ReportS3 E5
The Word - Victory!
Stephen suggests we redefine our goals to what is actually happening. Then victory will be ours.
01/15/2007
06:29
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
Dinesh D'Souza
Dinesh D'Souza believes saying that the cultural left is causing America's destruction would be going too far.
01/16/2007
03:59
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
Sport Report - Bend it Like Beckham
David Beckham comes to America to be an actor, and Stephen has the perfect project for him.
01/16/2007
00:35
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
Intro - 1/16/07
Stephen begins the show with some self-aggrandizing vocal warm-ups.
01/16/2007
03:37
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
The Word - Symbolic
A symbolic Congress makes a symbolic stand against a symbolic war.
01/16/2007
03:20
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
Pesos for Pizza
Stephen is forced to rethink his three least favorite words: the Hollywood Foreign Press.
01/16/2007
01:36
The Colbert ReportS3 E6
Squeaky Chair
Stephen is feeling a little high-strung with Bill O'Reilly's impending visit, and his chair is caught in the crossfire.
01/16/2007
06:03
The Colbert ReportS3 E7
Lynn Swann
Hall of Famer Lynn Swann helps Stephen trash-talk the remaining NFL playoff teams that aren't the New Orleans Saints.
01/17/2007
05:57
The Colbert ReportS3 E7
Better Know a District - Washington's 3rd - Brian Baird
Stephen brings clinical psychologist/Congressman Brian Baird to a safe place.
01/17/2007
You may also like1 Video
Trailer
00:15
Watch the Emmy-Winning Schitt's Creek from the Beginning
Get to know the Rose family. Watch the hit comedy Schitt's Creek every Friday starting at 8/7c.
10/03/2020