The Colbert Report

Neil deGrasse Tyson

Season 3 • 04/30/2007

The newly discovered planet is so far away, it's just now receiving "Beavis and Butthead."

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00:31

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 4/26/07

The U.S. Army's constructing walls in Iraq, Stephen gets to know Guam better, and author Tom Wolfe talks about journalism.
04/26/2007
03:30

The Colbert ReportS3
Stephanie Lost

Stephen reminds Stephanie Colbertle the turtle to maintain her dignity after losing the Great Turtle Race.
04/26/2007
03:48

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Mending Wall

Gated communities in Iraq -- they've been doing it Florida and the old people seem to like it.
04/26/2007
00:38

The Colbert ReportS3
Exclusive - Better Know a Protectorate - Guam - Madeleine Bordallo Pt. 2

Stephen asks Representative Madeleine Bordallo if she's ever tasted horse flesh.
04/26/2007
05:40

The Colbert ReportS3
Better Know a Protectorate - Guam - Madeleine Bordallo

Stephen tells Guam Rep. Madeleine Bordallo that if she can't find Guam on a map of the continental U.S. that means Guam isn't part of America.
04/26/2007
00:13

The Colbert ReportS3
Sign Off - Yuri Kuklachev

Stephen apologizes to Yuri Kuklachev of the Moscow Cat Circus for bringing his Rottweiler to work.
04/26/2007
00:32

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 4/30/07

Scientists find a new Earth-like planet, The New York Times encourages presidential candidates to debate the environment, and guest Bill Bradley talks about oil and ice cream.
04/30/2007
04:36

The Colbert ReportS3
Tip/Wag - Shrek

Bravo, Shrek, for encouraging our kids to do more than sit around the house all day watching 'Shrek' DVDs.
04/30/2007
05:54

The Colbert ReportS3
Bill Bradley

Stephen tells Bill Bradley he doesn't mind the old American story or being addicted to oil.
04/30/2007
03:20

The Colbert ReportS3
First Democratic Debate for '08

Stephen has a recurring nightmare where the Democrats take over the Senate and the House, and he cannot wait to wake up.
04/30/2007
05:20

The Colbert ReportS3
Neil deGrasse Tyson

Stephen assumes Neil deGrasse Tyson's book, "Death By Black Hole," is a pro-capital punishment argument.
04/30/2007
00:02

The Colbert ReportS3
Sign Off - Lutefisk

Goodnight. Lutefisk!
05/01/2007
01:22

The Colbert ReportS3
Mitt's Favorite Book

Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney's favorite author is L. Ron Hubbard.
05/01/2007
00:33

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 5/1/07

Stephen wonders whether public radio is destroying America, Tony Stewart accuses NASCAR of fixing races, and guest Malcolm Gladwell defends making decisions without thinking.
05/01/2007
04:16

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Who Cares?

NASCAR driver Tony Stewart complains NASCAR is selling fiction by fixing races to appear closer than they are, but Stephen asks -- who cares?
05/01/2007
03:56

The Colbert ReportS3
NPR Correction

Stephen offers a travel mug, tote bag and a book on quilting to NPR hosts to tempt them to air his inaccurate statements.
05/01/2007
06:19

The Colbert ReportS3
Malcolm Gladwell

Malcolm Gladwell explains that Colin Powell knew what would happen in Iraq because of his experience and Stephen claims knowledge is elitist.
05/01/2007
03:00

The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen's Horse

As a child, Stephen gave up his velvet hat and jodhpurs to play center field.
05/01/2007
00:32

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 5/2/07

George Bush vetoes the Iraq funding bill, guest Gina Kolata says Americans are obsessed with losing weight, and captured terrorists: should they be sent abroad to be tortured?
05/02/2007
03:00

The Colbert ReportS3
HR 1591

Bill HR 1591 opposing the Iraq war was born May 1st, 2007 at 3:30 p.m. It died May 1st, 2007 at 6:10 p.m. Stephen is sorry for the Democrats' loss.
05/02/2007
05:35

The Colbert ReportS3
Gina Kolata

Stephen asks Gina Kolata what the one food is he can eat that will make him lose weight and make sure he never dies.
05/02/2007
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