The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Three Stockings

Season 1 • 12/14/2005

Stephen fills up three Christmas stockings.

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05:40

Bob Costas
The Colbert ReportS1

Bob Costas reveals which sports are manly and which ones are just low-scoring European prance parties.
12/13/2005
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00:28

Intro - 12/13/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen determines what makes a great coach and learns about performance-enhancing steroids. Plus, Bob Costas will judge Stephen's triple salchow.
12/13/2005
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03:36

The De-Ballification of the American Sportscape
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen demonstrates how the telestrator works on actual footage of Tony Blair playing soccer.
12/13/2005
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01:00

Sign Off - Excellence in Everything
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen presents tonight's Colbert Report Special Report trophy for the Omnisport Award for Excellence in Everything.
12/13/2005
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01:15

Sports Update
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen checks some of last night's sports scores by using the footage he can afford.
12/13/2005
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01:21

King Kong
The Colbert ReportS1

"King Kong" is an allegory for the times: Kong is Bush, Skull Island is Washington and Naomi Watts is America.
12/14/2005
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06:19

Dermot Mulroney
The Colbert ReportS1

Dermot Mulroney tells Stephen about his new movie, what it's like to be a chick-flick actor, and whether or not he could take Yo-Yo Ma.
12/14/2005
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03:27

Tip/Wag - Redefining Cruel and Unusual
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen tips his hat to the Pentagon for redefining cruel and unusual interrogation tactics and wags his finger at Australia's riots.
12/14/2005
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00:29

Intro - 12/14/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen reports on President Bush's awareness level, reminds America of his journalistic status and talks to actor Dermot Mulroney.
12/14/2005
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03:04

The Word - Travolta
The Colbert ReportS1

Newsweek says Bush is in a bubble. Stephen doesn't think that's a bad thing.
12/14/2005
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02:10

Sign Off - Three Stockings
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen puts an IOU for an Xbox 360 in The Heroes' stocking.
12/14/2005
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05:40

Mark Cuban
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen talks to Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban about politics and how he became a billionaire.
12/15/2005
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01:35

Tax Deductions
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen explains what you need to know about business-related tax deductions and shows off some of the items that he'll be deducting.
12/15/2005
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02:00

War on Holiday
The Colbert ReportS1

After researching the origin of the word "holiday," Stephen declares war on "holiday."
12/15/2005
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06:30

Better Know a District - New York's 11th - Major Owens
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen tries out a rap poem about Brooklyn Congressman Major Owens and proposes an alternative to raising the minimum wage.
12/15/2005
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00:30

Intro - 12/15/05
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen covers the war on Christmas, wonders about the coming year and chats with billionaire Mark Cuban about what money can't buy.
12/15/2005
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03:29

The Word - Jetpack
The Colbert ReportS1

As 2005 comes to a close, Stephen reflects on The Colbert Report and looks forward to beginning the new year.
12/15/2005
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04:01

The Word - There Is No Word
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen has been hypnotized out of remembering any associations with Jack Abramoff.
01/09/2006
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03:11

Tip/Wag - Addicted to Cute
The Colbert ReportS2

Studies show that things that cuteness stimulates the same part of the brain as drugs, sex and delicious food.
01/09/2006
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03:04

On Notice/Dead to Me - Word of the Year
The Colbert ReportS2

"Truthiness" receives the American Dialect Society's Word of the Year award. Stephen receives no credit.
01/09/2006
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01:11

The Lusk-Alito Connection
The Colbert ReportS2

Reverend Herbert H. Lusk hosts a huge rally for Supreme Court Justice nominee Samuel J. Alito because, apparently, he really believes in him.
01/09/2006
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