The Colbert Report
A Man's Touch
Season 3 • 01/15/2007
Stephen's offer of love stands, Madame Secretary.
The Colbert ReportS3 What Number Is Stephen Thinking Of? - Doubled Up
Stephen reminds his viewers that just because the numbers on the board are between one and five hundred, that doesn't mean the number he's thinking of is.
The Colbert ReportS3 Tip/Wag - Science and Technology
Stephen is outraged by the iPhone unless he gets one for free.
The Colbert ReportS3 Judy Woodruff
Judy Woodruff talks about her new PBS documentary on Generation Next and grills Stephen on his tattoos.
The Colbert ReportS3 Ken Roth
On the fifth anniversary of Guantanamo Bay, Human Rights Watch executive director Ken Roth joins Stephen.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/11/07
Stephen sends a monogrammed waterboard to Guantanamo for its fifth anniversary.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Victory!
Stephen suggests we redefine our goals to what is actually happening. Then victory will be ours.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/15/07
Stephen discusses plastic surgery with author Alex Kuczynski and debuts his new financial segment.
The Colbert ReportS3 Alex Kuczynski
Alex Kuczynski explains why we don't look better after spending $15 billion on plastic surgery.
The Colbert ReportS3 Bears & Balls - Gas
Buy gas! It's a sure-fire commodity with no risk except for the sure risk of fire.
The Colbert ReportS3 Inspired by Dr. King
Stephen calls for a national lie-in. It's time to go beyond passive resistance to pure passiveness.
The Colbert ReportS3 A Man's Touch
It's insensitive to remind Condoleezza Rice that she's going to die without knowing a man's touch.
The Colbert ReportS3 Squeaky Chair
Stephen is feeling a little high-strung with Bill O'Reilly's impending visit, and his chair is caught in the crossfire.
The Colbert ReportS3 Pesos for Pizza
Stephen is forced to rethink his three least favorite words: the Hollywood Foreign Press.
The Colbert ReportS3 The Word - Symbolic
A symbolic Congress makes a symbolic stand against a symbolic war.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/16/07
Stephen begins the show with some self-aggrandizing vocal warm-ups.
The Colbert ReportS3 Sport Report - Bend it Like Beckham
David Beckham comes to America to be an actor, and Stephen has the perfect project for him.
The Colbert ReportS3 Dinesh D'Souza
Dinesh D'Souza believes saying that the cultural left is causing America's destruction would be going too far.
The Colbert ReportS3 Better Know a District - Washington's 3rd - Brian Baird
Stephen brings clinical psychologist/Congressman Brian Baird to a safe place.
The Colbert ReportS3 Lynn Swann
Hall of Famer Lynn Swann helps Stephen trash-talk the remaining NFL playoff teams that aren't the New Orleans Saints.
The Colbert ReportS3 Intro - 1/17/07
It's Stephen's 200th show and he wants a commemorative coin.
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