The Colbert Report
Exclusive - The Morning Asylum
Season 6 • 10/02/2009

Stephen plays an excerpt from his 80s morning radio show, "The Morning Asylum with Stevie C and Dr. Dave."

Watching

02:41

The Colbert ReportS5 E125
Send Your Medical Bills to Max Baucus

Senator Max Baucus will pay for your medical bills from the $3.2 million he's received from the health care industry.
09/30/2009
03:39

The Colbert ReportS5 E125
A Pace Odyssey

NASA begins assembling Stephen's treadmill so America's famously fat astronauts can get trim in space.
09/30/2009
05:42

The Colbert ReportS5 E125
Richard Dawkins

After offering evidence for evolution, Richard Dawkins wants to see the evidence for God.
09/30/2009
07:14

The Colbert ReportS5 E125
ThreatDown - Environmentalists, Kang Lee & Mountain Pine Beetles

Environmentalists target soft toilet paper, Kang Lee exposes the lies parents tell kids, and mountain pine beetles prevent us from shooting bears.
09/30/2009
00:29

The Colbert ReportS5 E125
Intro - 9/30/09

Stephen has an update on his space treadmill, and he'll evolve Richard Dawkins' book into tiny shreds of paper.
09/30/2009
04:11

The Colbert ReportS5 E126
Francis Collins

Francis Collins informs Stephen that it's going to take time for stem cell research to give him crab claws.
10/01/2009
05:09

The Colbert ReportS5 E126
Eating the Distance - The Brad Sciullo Story Pt. 1

Competitive eater Brad Sciullo wants to prove anything is possible by finishing a 15-pound hamburger called "The Belly Buster."
10/01/2009
02:03

The Colbert ReportS5 E126
Najibullah Zazi Threatens Beauty Supplies

Suspected terrorist Najibullah Zazi threatens America's unregulated use of beauty supplies.
10/01/2009
00:25

The Colbert ReportS5 E126
Sign Off - New Slang

Stephen introduces some new slang into the teen lexicon.
10/01/2009
08:03

The Colbert ReportS5 E126
2016 Olympics in Chicago - George Wendt

George Wendt and Stephen trash talk Rio de Janeiro, Madrid and Tokyo for competing against Chicago's 2016 Olympics bid.
10/01/2009
00:47

The Colbert ReportS6
Exclusive - The Morning Asylum

Stephen plays an excerpt from his 80s morning radio show, "The Morning Asylum with Stevie C and Dr. Dave."
10/02/2009
06:30

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
Arne Duncan

Secretary of Education Arne Duncan wants longer school hours so American students can compete with the rest of the world.
10/05/2009
04:42

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
Eating the Distance - The Brad Sciullo Story Pt. 2

Brad Sciullo's training regime of drinking, vomiting and trout prepares him to conquer "The Belly Buster."
10/05/2009
00:03

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for The Report.
10/05/2009
01:25

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
Americans for Prosperity Cheer Chicago's Failure

The conservative group, Americans for Prosperity, cheers when they hear the news of Chicago's failure to host the 2016 Olympics.
10/05/2009
00:34

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
Intro - 10/5/09

President Obama proposes a longer school year, and Arne Duncan could only get a job as a secretary.
10/05/2009
05:46

The Colbert ReportS5 E127
The Word - Learning Is Fundamental

As a fifth grader and small businessman, Andy Gellman has to think about how longer school hours will affect the economy.
10/05/2009
03:28

The Colbert ReportS5 E128
John Darnielle

John Darnielle discusses his cheerfully desolate song lyrics and his respect for suicidal mountain goats.
10/06/2009
04:32

The Colbert ReportS5 E128
Formula 401: A Star Is Born

Your baby can look like whichever celebrity Stephen impersonates while creating Formula 401: A Star Is Born.
10/06/2009
01:09

The Colbert ReportS5 E128
New Swine Flu Vaccine Drops

The swine flu vaccine shoots straight to the top of the vaccine charts, blowing away Japanese encephalitis.
10/06/2009
07:10

The Colbert ReportS5 E128
The Road Ahead in Afghanistan - Lara Logan

As President Obama decides how to move forward in Afghanistan, Lara Logan explains the goals of Al Qaeda and the Taliban.
10/06/2009