The Colbert Report
Season 1 • 11/14/2005
Stephen asks Bob Kerrey when we can leave Iraq.
The DaColbert Code - Samuel AlitoThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen uses The DaColbert Code to pierce the veil of secrecy and solve modern-day mysteries.
The In-Box - Asian StereotypesThe Colbert ReportS1
In an attempt to apologize for accidentally perpetuating an Asian stereotype, Stephen shares some of The Report's airtime with its sister station in Osaka.
The Word - ArmisticeThe Colbert ReportS1
President Bush is saving Veterans Day by creating thousands of new veterans.
Swear to GodThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen believes that big oil company CEOs should have sworn in before testifying to Congress.
Internets AnniversaryThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen buys himself an Internet anniversary present from eBay.
The Word - TestosteroneThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen thinks women are weaker than men for being incapable of completely abandoning their humanity.
CMA BuzzThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen is giddy with anticipation for the Country music Awards -- not to be confused with the CMT Flame Worthy Awards or the ACM awards.
Intro - 11/14/05The Colbert ReportS1
Terrorist bombings in Jordan may be the first sign that women have blown up the glass ceiling.
Tip Line - Flag StickerThe Colbert ReportS1
Call Stephen if you have a new way to display the flag on your car.
Un-American News - Shame CottonThe Colbert ReportS1
The Japanese are so ashamed of their prime minister's suicide attempt, they hide their ashamed faces behind shame cotton.
Bob KerreyThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen pitches former Senator Bob Kerrey his plan for training the Iraqi army.
The Word - The OrientThe Colbert ReportS1
George W. Bush is going to Asia, and Stephen has some pointers -- not vomiting and not bringing back any pandas are two big ones.
Formidable Opponent - TortureThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen explains to Stephen the pros of torture: how it can be used, how it should be used and why it's okay to feel dirty about it.
Intro - 11/15/05The Colbert ReportS1
Stephen reincarnates some Asians, calls up some viewers and talks to Al Sharpton about his plans for the next five elections.
Sayako's WeddingThe Colbert ReportS1
Stephen is pretty wiped-out -- after last night's episode, he flew to Japan to attend the wedding of his friend, Princess Sayako.
Fract - Mt. RushmoreThe Colbert ReportS1
Mt. Rushmore depicts several famous people, and all of them are American.
Al SharptonThe Colbert ReportS1
Al Sharpton talks about the war in Iraq, racism and the best ways to motivate yourself to lose some weight.
Bring 'Em Back or Leave 'Em Dead - Asian HistoryThe Colbert ReportS1
Thinking over a list of significant players in Asia's history, the only one that doesn't make it is the band, Asia.
Intro - 11/16/05The Colbert ReportS1
The Senate wants oversight of the Iraq war. What's next -- the Supreme Court interpreting a law?
Better Know a District - Colorado's 2nd - Mark UdallThe Colbert ReportS1
Failing to climb Mt. Everest on three tries doesn't make Representative Mark Udall a quitter -- there's another word for it.
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