The Colbert Report

Intro - 3/9/11

Season 7 • 03/09/2011

Antonin Scalia will know if Clarence Thomas has a conflict of interest.

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00:37

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Welcome Zoe Simone Sanchez

Stephen is sure Zoe Simone Sanchez is wearing a limited edition Vera Wang onesie.
03/08/2011
06:03

The Colbert ReportS7
Dan Sinker

Dan Sinker questions the sanity of anyone who actually thought he was Rahm Emanuel on Twitter.
03/08/2011
02:13

The Colbert ReportS7
Happy Mardi Gras & International Women's Day

Stephen celebrates women's regrettable self-exposure and their achievements on Mardi Gras Day.
03/08/2011
03:18

The Colbert ReportS7
Charlie Sheen & Fake Rahm Emanuel on Twitter

Charlie Sheen gets a new gig as Twitter overlord, and the fake Rahm Emanuel is unmasked.
03/08/2011
04:17

The Colbert ReportS7
Light Bulb Ban

The socket huggers claim that pigtail bulbs last up to 10 years, but they haven't considered how the efficient lights will affect the joke-telling industry.
03/08/2011
05:24

The Colbert ReportS7
Bench Press - Anthony Weiner

Anthony Weiner wants to ensure that the Supreme Court upholds a standard of ethics by asking Clarence Thomas to recuse himself from health care cases.
03/09/2011
05:40

The Colbert ReportS7
David Brooks

David Brooks describes the way unconscious emotions affect people's decisions and values.
03/09/2011
04:35

The Colbert ReportS7
Stephen Gives Up Catholicism for Lent

Giving up Catholicism for Lent shows Stephen's devotion to the great religion that he no longer practices.
03/09/2011
03:37

The Colbert ReportS7
Bench Press

If every Supreme Court justice had to recuse themselves over a conflict of interest, we would never see John Roberts' NASCAR robe.
03/09/2011
00:42

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Jewish Stephen

Now that Stephen is Jewish, he is legally obligated to tell you to call your mother.
03/09/2011
00:26

The Colbert ReportS7
Intro - 3/9/11

Clarence Thomas may have a conflict of interest, and Stephen hopes David Brooks' book, "The Social Animal," is about a hamster on Facebook.
03/09/2011
00:45

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Enjoy the Moment

Stephen wants everyone to take a deep breath and enjoy the moment.
03/10/2011
02:16

The Colbert ReportS7
Newt Gingrich Wants to Screw America

Newt Gingrich only cheated on his wives because he's so passionate about America.
03/10/2011
01:29

The Colbert ReportS7
Colbert PAC Ad

Stephen launches ColbertPAC.com with his very own high-budget promotional video.
03/10/2011
03:31

The Colbert ReportS7
Peter King Understands Violent Radicalism

Tennessee fights back against Sharia law, and Peter King holds a hearing to investigate radical American Muslims.
03/10/2011
06:16

The Colbert ReportS7
Colbert PAC Ad

Stephen shows support for Tim Pawlenty's courage to stand next to Scott Walker with a patriotic message.
03/10/2011
00:31

The Colbert ReportS7
Intro - 3/10/11

Al Qaeda recruits Americans, and Reza Aslan will talk about the Islamic-American experience if he makes it past Stephen's security.
03/10/2011
06:36

The Colbert ReportS7
Reza Aslan

Reza Aslan thinks Peter King's hearings to investigate Muslim radicalization are a useless enterprise.
03/10/2011
00:32

The Colbert ReportS7
Intro - 3/21/11

The escalating conflict in Libya means good news for troops, Stephen's self-portrait goes up for auction, and Steve Martin does some bluegrass.
03/21/2011
01:24

The Colbert ReportS7
Exclusive - Raging Art-On Pt. 5

Stephen warms up and gives his portrait a pep talk in preparation for the big auction at an art gallery in New York.
03/21/2011
07:39

The Colbert ReportS7
Raging Art-On - Art 1

Stephen talks to Simon de Pury and checks out the competition at the Phillips de Pury Gallery.
03/21/2011
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