The Colbert Report

Mort Zuckerman

Season 2 • 07/12/2006

Mort Zuckerman faces the "on notice" music.

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04:55

Coddling Our Kids
The Colbert ReportS2

Getting hit in the face with a utility ball teaches you something about life -- it teaches you not to get hit in the face with a utility ball.
07/11/2006
02:44

The Word - Psychopharmaparenting
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen doesn't know the long-term effects of medicating kids, but he does know the long-term effects it will have on the pharmaceutical industry.
07/11/2006
00:41

Intro - 7/11/06
The Colbert ReportS2

This show is dedicated to our kids: what the hell is wrong with them?
07/11/2006
03:25

Stephen R.A.P.S. - Talkin' to Kids
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen's spent enough time talking to parents, now it's time to loosen the tie and talk to some troubled teens.
07/11/2006
01:11

Stephen Colbert's World of ColbertCraft
The Colbert ReportS2

"Stephen Colbert's World of ColbertCraft" will be even more popular than his previous video game, "Stephen Colbert's Escape from Skateboard Mountain."
07/11/2006
00:32

Intro - 7/12/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen reports on the Supreme Court enforcing the Geneva Conventions, questions Washington State Congressman Rick Larsen, and interviews publisher Mort Zuckerman.
07/12/2006
03:11

Massachusetts - Gaysrael
The Colbert ReportS2

The best way to protect marriage is to ban gay marriage in all states, but Massachusetts -- creating a Gaysrael.
07/12/2006
03:19

The Word - The America Conventions
The Colbert ReportS2

If the Swiss had their way, every war would be fought with a tiny knife, a nail file, a magnifying glass and a toothpick.
07/12/2006
00:09

Sign Off - Space Open
The Colbert ReportS2

Mort Zuckerman is removed from the on notice board, but there is now room for enemies of freedom.
07/12/2006
06:19

Better Know a District - Washington's 2nd - Rick Larsen
The Colbert ReportS2

Congressman Rick Larsen doesn't support the proposed wall to separate the United States from Canada.
07/12/2006
06:28

Mort Zuckerman
The Colbert ReportS2

Mort Zuckerman believes that George W. Bush is an awful president but feels that John Kerry would have been worse.
07/12/2006
00:31

Intro - 7/13/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Joe Lieberman faces a tough challenge in the Democratic primary, the Senate eases a ban on prescription drugs from Canada, and Stephen interviews author Ron Suskind.
07/13/2006
05:49

ThreatDown - Gay Clones
The Colbert ReportS2

The guy who played Anakin Beefstroker in "Sperm Wars II: Attack of the Bones" was actually better than Hayden Christensen.
07/13/2006
03:52

The Word - Inquisition
The Colbert ReportS2

Connecticut, you chose Joe Lieberman in 1988; you can't just say 'oops, I made a mistake' and elect another Democrat.
07/13/2006
03:31

TV's New Low
The Colbert ReportS2

If you aren't watching The Colbert Report because you're busy guarding our borders, you can buy 16 episodes on iTunes for $9.99.
07/13/2006
06:28

Ron Suskind
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen explains to author Ron Suskind that if we didn't invade someone, we would have tripped over our preparedness.
07/13/2006
00:10

Sign Off - Lemons
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen reminds everyone that if God gives you lemons, you must be a bad person.
07/17/2006
06:24

Lee Silver
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen makes sure Princeton professor Lee Silver knows that he doesn't know more than Stephen does about genetic engineering.
07/17/2006
00:37

Intro - 7/17/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen talks about the crisis in the Middle East, reports on Arizona's new voting proposal, and interviews author Lee Silver.
07/17/2006
02:54

The Word - T & A
The Colbert ReportS2

There's only one thing that truly unites mankind -- the objectification of womankind.
07/17/2006
04:49

Tip/Wag - Arizona
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen tips his hat to Iraqi television, Wal-Mart and aliens, and wags his finger at the state of Arizona and Wal-Mart.
07/17/2006
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