The Colbert Report
Hermaphrodites Can't Be Gay
Season 6 • 02/04/2010
No matter who hermaphrodites are doing it with, it's straight.
Job Man Caravan - Peter CoveThe Colbert ReportS6
Peter Cove helps the studio audience get back to work by taking questions and offering advice.
Sign Off - Office PoolThe Colbert ReportS6
If you had "30 minutes" in your office Length of the Colbert Report Pool, you won.
Intro - 2/3/10The Colbert ReportS6
Stephen asks if gays should be allowed to serve openly in the military, and John Durant wants us to live like cavemen.
Job Man CaravanThe Colbert ReportS6
Unemployment is racing out of control faster than a Toyota Camry through your grandmother's garage door.
Be Almost All That You Can BeThe Colbert ReportS6
John McCain won't consider changing the "don't ask, don't tell" policy until he hears from every leader of the military.
Intro - 2/4/10The Colbert ReportS6
A CIA agent makes startling revelations, and Henry Louis Gates, Jr. reveals Stephen's ancestry.
Henry Louis Gates, Jr.The Colbert ReportS6
Henry Louis Gates, Jr. informs Stephen that he's the whitest man he's ever tested using genetic analysis.
Tip/Wag - Waterboarding & Canada's HistoryThe Colbert ReportS6
A former CIA operative admits to lying about the effectiveness of waterboarding, and The Beaver changes its name to Canada's History.
Own a Piece of Histor-Me - Fireplace PortraitThe Colbert ReportS6
The final item up for auction is Stephen's old fireplace portrait benefiting the Yellow Ribbon Fund.
Formidable Opponent - Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's TrialThe Colbert ReportS6
Stephen wants to give Khalid Sheikh Mohammed a fair public trial until he hears Stephen's defense.
Hermaphrodites Can't Be GayThe Colbert ReportS6
It is physically impossible for hermaphrodites to be gay -- they can be straight, double straight or double gay.
Jonathan Safran FoerThe Colbert ReportS6
Jonathan Safran Foer says the U.S. farm system is perfectly antithetical to American values.
Sarah Palin Uses a Hand-O-PrompterThe Colbert ReportS6
Sarah Palin uses a hand-o-prompter and defends Rush Limbaugh for calling liberals "retards."
Office Super Bowl Ad PoolThe Colbert ReportS6
Toyota's Super Bowl ad should have had a talking crocodile plowing his Prius into a herd of sexy zebras.
The Word - Faux 'N' TellThe Colbert ReportS6
If the underwear bomber was weak enough to give intelligence when he wasn't tortured, imagine what he would have said under duress.
Sign Off - It's Lonely at the TopThe Colbert ReportS6
Stephen's lonely at the top, and he can't imagine what it's like where you are.
George StephanopoulosThe Colbert ReportS6
George Stephanopoulos discusses his work on "The Week" and "GMA" over a Heineken.
Celebrate Black History Month With HeinekenThe Colbert ReportS6
The best way to rejoice in the achievements of our black countrymen is with a Heineken.
Corporate Free Speech - Chris DoddThe Colbert ReportS6
Chris Dodd proposes a constitutional amendment to prevent elections from becoming the Super Bowl of advertising.
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