The Colbert Report

The Word - It Gets Worse

Season 9 • 01/30/2013

House Republicans hire super-straight lawyer Paul Clement to defend the Defense of Marriage Act.

More

Watching

05:58

George Saunders
The Colbert ReportS9

The MacArthur Grant Fellow uses analogies to explain why he prefers short stories over novels.
01/29/2013
03:21

Guantanamo Bay Office Closure
The Colbert ReportS9

The Obama administration reassigns the guy who failed to close Gitmo to a more cushy post: solving the Middle East.
01/29/2013
03:50

Iran's Space Monkey & America's Ape Moratorium
The Colbert ReportS9

Iran acquires weapons of macaque destruction, while the National Institute of Health retires 110 government-owned chimpanzees.
01/29/2013
04:08

Gun Control & State Sovereignty - Cliff Sloan
The Colbert ReportS9

The former associate White House counsel describes past nullification efforts during the Civil War and Brown v. Board.
01/29/2013
00:34

Intro - 1/29/13
The Colbert ReportS9

States wonder if they have to follow federal law, the war on terror persists, and George Saunders shares his critically-acclaimed book.
01/29/2013
00:31

Intro - 1/30/13
The Colbert ReportS9

Gays and lesbians advocate for same-sex marriage, the Ku Klux Klan makes big changes, and billionaire philanthropist Bill Gates joins Stephen.
01/30/2013
07:03

Bill Gates
The Colbert ReportS9

Microsoft's founder talks about polio eradication, information technology and the decline in childhood deaths worldwide.
01/30/2013
04:48

Non-Racist KKK
The Colbert ReportS9

The new Ku Klux Klan spreads its positive message the way any open-minded group would: door to door in the dead of night.
01/30/2013
03:20

Coming Out Benefits & Gay Rights
The Colbert ReportS9

Psychosomatic Medicine prints a study on gay men's stress levels, and conservatives have been saying gays should have equal rights since the beginning of this sentence.
01/30/2013
00:06

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen says goodnight.
01/30/2013
04:59

The Word - It Gets Worse
The Colbert ReportS9

Pro-DOMA lawyer Paul Clement thinks the struggle for gay rights has just been too successful, so it therefore must end in failure.
01/30/2013
04:27

Sport Report - Gatorade Chemicals & Chicken Wing Shortage
The Colbert ReportS9

Gatorade without flame retardant is like hotdogs without pig sphincter, and chicken thieves run a-fowl as wing prices fly high.
01/31/2013
01:10

Sign Off - Welcome Baby Sanchez!
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen congratulates his wardrobe mistress who just gave birth to the newest citizen of Colbert Nation.
01/31/2013
03:22

Craziest F#?King Thing I've Ever Heard - Crows Using Tools
The Colbert ReportS9

A bird demonstrates higher-level thinking while Big Bird, after 40 years, still needs help counting to 10.
01/31/2013
05:58

Sport Report - Ads for Ads & Deer Antler Spray
The Colbert ReportS9

TiVo watchers practice fast-forwarding, and Sports Illustrated accuses Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis of deer antler doping.
01/31/2013
06:48

Bipartisan Immigration Reform
The Colbert ReportS9

Latino immigrants deserve the same Social Security, Medicare and public education benefits that all Americans are slowly losing.
02/04/2013
02:45

Skeet Shooting Skeptics
The Colbert ReportS9

If President Obama really loved guns, he'd be waving them around at a petting zoo and picking off baby goats, not skeet shooting.
02/04/2013
06:44

Sonia Sotomayor
The Colbert ReportS9

Justice Sotomayor discusses her funny colleagues, self-reliant childhood and most conservative belief as an Independent.
02/04/2013
03:21

Super Bowl XLVII
The Colbert ReportS9

Budweiser turns out a tearjerker ad, Beyonce ends the halftime tradition of arthritic legends, and the Superdome loses power for 35 minutes.
02/04/2013
00:36

Intro - 2/4/13
The Colbert ReportS9

The GOP tries to appeal to Hispanics, President Obama seeks support from gun owners, and Sonia Sotomayor is the first Hispanic Supreme Court Justice.
02/04/2013
00:06

Sign Off - Second Amendment
The Colbert ReportS9

Stephen reviews the Second Amendment and says goodnight.
02/04/2013
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
02:29

A Familiar Face Returns in Teen Wolf: The Movie

Derek Hale finds himself fighting for his life when a skilled hunter tracks down him and his son Eli in Teen Wolf: The Movie, premiering Thursday, January 26, 2023, on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends
Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022
Trailer
01:22

Out of Office Explores Remote Work Absurdity
Out of Office

A young woman experiences the bizarre extremes of working from home in the film Out of Office, starring Milana Vayntrub, Ken Jeong, Jay Pharoah, Cheri Oteri, Jason Alexander and more.
09/19/2022
Trailer
00:35

A Front Row Seat to South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert
South ParkS25

Sing along to silly songs and classic symphonies from the show on South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert, premiering August 13 at 10/9c.
07/27/2022