The Colbert Report

The Word - Monkey Butter

Season 2 • 06/29/2006

Stephen proposes taxing Americans for having sex.

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01:38

American Flags
The Colbert ReportS2

If Congress can't protect our flags from desecration, we're going to have to teach our flags to defend themselves.
06/28/2006
00:33

Intro - 6/28/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen reports on The New York Times, enlists citizens to cover the news, and interviews former CIA agent Robert Baer.
06/28/2006
00:17

Sign Off - Mr. Potato Head
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen urges viewers to keep sending in pictures of Chris Matthews eating potatoes.
06/28/2006
04:06

Citizens in Action - Fondue It Yourself
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen has created his own core of citizen journalists who will report on the concerns of real Americans like you.
06/28/2006
01:28

The President's BFF
The Colbert ReportS2

President Bush and Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi are BFFs. Following their lead, Stephen makes his own Japanese friend.
06/29/2006
03:00

Farewell, Supreme Court
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen does not like the Supreme Court's decision that the Bush administration does not have the authority to hold military trials for inmates at Guantanamo Bay.
06/29/2006
04:11

Difference Makers - Steve Pelkey
The Colbert ReportS2

Steve Pelkey's store in New Hampshire allows Massachusetts residents access to fireworks for the Fourth of July, making him the Harriet Tubman of fireworks.
06/29/2006
05:55

Christopher Noxon
The Colbert ReportS2

Author Christopher Noxon defines the difference between adults who are childish and those who are childlike.
06/29/2006
00:40

Intro - 6/29/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen reports on a pimp tax, fireworks laws, a book that claims adults act like children and America's birthday.
06/29/2006
01:14

Star Jones
The Colbert ReportS2

In solidarity with Star Jones leaving "The View," Stephen is also leaving his show -- for a week.
06/29/2006
03:37

The Word - Monkey Butter
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen proposes tracing the sexual activities of Americans with a microchip that has been injected into the "dirty area."
06/29/2006
03:36

Stephen's Sound Advice - Avoiding Wildfires
The Colbert ReportS2

By staying away from people and cutting down trees, you can greatly reduce the chances of starting a wildfire.
07/10/2006
00:28

Intro - 7/10/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen discusses how more companies are cutting pensions, provides a special report on wildfires and interviews Amy Sedaris.
07/10/2006
01:49

Wilford Brimley Calls - Mexico
The Colbert ReportS2

Wilford Brimley calls Stephen at 3 a.m. from Mexico to borrow some pesos.
07/10/2006
06:24

Amy Sedaris
The Colbert ReportS2

Amy Sedaris discusses her new movie, "Strangers With Candy," before tumbling with Stephen and Tad.
07/10/2006
03:06

The Word - Silver Foxes
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen criticizes the elderly and argues that you should only get to retire if you've earned it.
07/10/2006
03:52

World Cup Co-Champions
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen proves that since America did not lose to Italy, we are in fact co-champions of the World Cup.
07/10/2006
06:47

Tony Hawk
The Colbert ReportS2

Pro skateboarder Tony Hawk and Stephen agree that it's better to continue hurting yourself than to give up.
07/11/2006
04:55

Coddling Our Kids
The Colbert ReportS2

Getting hit in the face with a utility ball teaches you something about life -- it teaches you not to get hit in the face with a utility ball.
07/11/2006
02:44

The Word - Psychopharmaparenting
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen doesn't know the long-term effects of medicating kids, but he does know the long-term effects it will have on the pharmaceutical industry.
07/11/2006
00:41

Intro - 7/11/06
The Colbert ReportS2

This show is dedicated to our kids: what the hell is wrong with them?
07/11/2006
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