The Colbert Report
Season 3 • 03/26/2007
Stephen lost the auction for the original "We're Number One!" mummified hand.
Sport Report - NCAA Final FourThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen discusses March Madness and then talks with Coach Mancini of the Saginaw Spirit about the upcoming playoffs.
Sign Off - FutureThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen encourages his audience to join him for his upcoming show on Monday -- in the future.
Katie CouricThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen wonders if Katie Couric would have an easier time delivering the news if she did it as a man.
Eleanor Holmes NortonThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen doesn't see why D.C. residents should get a vote in Congress if they could just open a window and yell to have their voices heard.
Torture GonzalesThe Colbert ReportS3
How dare Chuck Hagel say we're living in a monarchy? The president should confiscate his lands and deny his peerage.
Stephen Colbert DayThe Colbert ReportS3
Oshawa, Ontario celebrates Stephen Colbert Day with a look-a-like contest.
Intro - 3/26/07The Colbert ReportS3
In tonight's episode, Stephen talks to John Perry Barlow about digital free speech and brings you highlights from Stephen Colbert Day in Oshawa, Ontario.
For Your Editing PleasureThe Colbert ReportS3
Gwen Ifill interviews Stephen, giving everyone a chance to twist his words through editing.
Sign Off - Photo-OpThe Colbert ReportS3
Don't forget to use the red-eye filter when you take a picture of Stephen.
John Perry BarlowThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen draws a chart for John Perry Barlow explaining that you don't bite the hand that feeds you.
MummyThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen missed his chance to bid in future auctions with an ancient mummified hand for a paddle.
James FallowsThe Colbert ReportS3
Author James Fallows explains to Stephen the difference between being a children's storybook writer and a strategist for the United States.
Madeleine AlbrightThe Colbert ReportS3
Though Stephen is excited for the imminent World War III, Madeleine Albright explains that Armageddon is not exactly a foreign policy.
Sean Penn Unleashes on President BushThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen challenges Sean Penn to a battle of the metaphors after Penn's attack on the president.
Tip/Wag - Drug DealersThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen wags his finger at drug dealers and tips his cap to GLAAD and mansheep.
Intro - 3/2707The Colbert ReportS3
Sean Penn insults the president, Stephen asks if we should go to war with Iran, and guest James Fallows discusses what went wrong in Iraq.
Sign Off - Going to Bed AngryThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen encourages his audience not to go to bed angry with each other.
Jabari AsimThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen suggests blaming the pilgrims for the origin of the "N" Word.
Claim to the ArcticThe Colbert ReportS3
Since no one yet has territorial claims to the South Pole, Stephen suggests planting an American flag and a Colbert Nation flag.
The Word - Monkey BusinessThe Colbert ReportS3
With scientists trying to prove that morality has a biological basis, Stephen thinks it's about time for religion to take things away from science.
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