The Colbert Report
Tim Pawlenty Declares Candidacy Before He's Ready
Season 7 • 04/13/2011
Tim Pawlenty declares his candidacy for president to Morgan the Organ.
Threat Level: RainbowThe Colbert ReportS7
The Family Leader's Bob Vander Plaats believes same-sex marriage is just as dangerous as second-hand smoke.
Mitt Happens - Rick BrookhiserThe Colbert ReportS7
Rick Brookhiser says Mitt Romney won't win the Republican nomination because he looks like the secret grandfather of Obamacare.
Intro - 4/12/11The Colbert ReportS7
Mitt Romney throws his hat in the presidential ring, and Ray Kurzweil believes man and machine are becoming one.
Jon Kyl Tweets Not Intended to Be Factual StatementsThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen celebrates Jon Kyl's groundbreaking excuse-planation by tweeting round-the-clock non-facts about him.
Ray KurzweilThe Colbert ReportS7
Ray Kurzweil predicts that people will merge with technology and become a billion times smarter by 2045.
Morgan SpurlockThe Colbert ReportS7
Morgan Spurlock pulls the curtain back on product placement and advertising in "The Greatest Movie Ever Sold."
Sign Off - Doritos SuitThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen wears a Doritos suit and enjoys Americone Dream.
The Enemy Within - UnicyclistsThe Colbert ReportS7
Riding unicycles used to be a shameful pastime for circus animals and secretaries of defense, but this one-wheel lifestyle is seeping into the mainstream.
The Word - Buy and CelluliteThe Colbert ReportS7
Unilever creates armpit insecurity among women so it can make money selling the solution.
Tim Pawlenty Declares Candidacy Before He's ReadyThe Colbert ReportS7
Tim Pawlenty tries to reclaim his non-candidacy, but no one's going to want Piers Morgan's sloppy seconds.
Colbert Super PAC - Trevor PotterThe Colbert ReportS7
Jay the Intern's pony is rested, watered and ready to take Stephen's super PAC forms to Washington, D.C.
Viacom Ruins Stephen's PAC DreamThe Colbert ReportS7
Stephen says goodbye to his dream of starting a Colbert PAC after receiving a letter from Viacom.
Easter Under Attack - Egg EditionThe Colbert ReportS7
A government-sponsored egg hunt in Ohio takes out the word "Easter," and the White House offers environmentally friendly eggs.
Caroline KennedyThe Colbert ReportS7
Caroline Kennedy and Stephen read poetry by W.H. Auden and Edna St. Vincent Millay.
Obama Needs Charts and GraphsThe Colbert ReportS7
Barack Obama needs to use graphs and charts in his speeches if he wants to keep people's attention.
Obama's Tax Return & Road to the Trump HouseThe Colbert ReportS7
President Obama makes his tax return public, and Donald Trump's special relationship with "the blacks" goes back decades.
Ron PaulThe Colbert ReportS7
Ron Paul defines liberty, criticizes the Federal Reserve and doesn't believe in the income tax.
Cheating Death - Vaxa International, Lap-Band Surgery & Restless Leg SyndromeThe Colbert ReportS7
Prescott ends its proud Vaxa line, the FDA approves Lap-Band surgery for the cheerfully obese, and masturbation calms restless leg syndrome.
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