The Colbert Report

The Conservative Teen

Season 8 • 03/28/2012

Kids, this ain't your father's magazine -- it was just written by him.

More

Watching

04:22

The Colbert ReportS8
Tip/Wag - Anti-Prejudice Drug & Dick Cheney's Heart

Popping pills reduces racial prejudice, and Stephen reveals the identity of Dick Cheney's anonymous heart donor.
03/27/2012
00:05

The Colbert ReportS8
Sign Off - Goodnight

Stephen says goodnight.
03/27/2012
00:32

The Colbert ReportS8
Intro - 3/27/12

A new pill can cure prejudice, there's an innovation in food delivery, and Charles Murray has written a book about the state of white America.
03/27/2012
07:23

The Colbert ReportS8
Charles Murray

Charles Murray talks about his book, "Coming Apart: The State of White America, 1960 to 2010," and suggests a way to address the growing division between the classes.
03/27/2012
04:55

The Colbert ReportS8
Barack Obama-Gun Control Conspiracy

The fear of not being able to buy guns during a second Obama term leads to Americans buying so many guns that now they can't buy any guns, just like they feared.
03/27/2012
03:36

The Colbert ReportS8
Thought for Food - Tacocopter

Tacocopter's drone helicopter taco delivery is the first step to achieving intercontinental ballistic munchies, but there are some safety concerns.
03/27/2012
05:33

The Colbert ReportS8
The Supreme Court Weighs In on Obamacare - Emily Bazelon

Luckily, Emily Bazelon wasn't arguing for Obamacare's individual mandate in the Supreme Court, because she might have won.
03/28/2012
04:40

The Colbert ReportS8
The Supreme Court Weighs In on Obamacare

The solicitor general's defense of Obamacare was a train wreck that slammed into the Hindenberg, landed on the deck of the Titanic, and then sailed in to see "John Carter."
03/28/2012
00:06

The Colbert ReportS8
Sign Off - Goodnight Snack

Stephen says goodnight and pours himself a bowl of cereal.
03/28/2012
07:19

The Colbert ReportS8
Mark Ruffalo

Actor Mark Ruffalo became an anti-fracking, clean water activist after seeing the technologies' detrimental impact on communities in Pennsylvania.
03/28/2012
02:47

The Colbert ReportS8
The Conservative Teen

Finally there's a publication for kids who are sick of doing their own thing and just want to conform to conservative ideals.
03/28/2012
00:06

The Colbert ReportS8
Sign Off - Colbert Super PAC Super Fun Pack

Stephen says goodnight brandishing the Colbert Super PAC Super Fun Pack.
03/29/2012
04:18

The Colbert ReportS8
The Mega Millions Lottery

Stephen Stephen tries to win the Mega Millions Lottery with his lucky numbers: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6.
03/29/2012
00:34

The Colbert ReportS8
Intro - 3/29/12

Stephen approves of college students being political players, Mitt Romney proves he's just like average Americans, and Peter Beinart has a book about the future of Israel.
03/29/2012
07:03

The Colbert ReportS8
Colbert Super PAC - Texan Supporters & Super Fun Pack

Texans contribute more to Colbert Super PAC than to Romney's super PAC, and Stephen wants every college across this great nation to have its own Colbert Super PAC.
03/29/2012
05:37

The Colbert ReportS8
Peter Beinart

Peter Beinart discusses his book "The Crisis of Zionism" and what he sees as a divide between the democratic Israel and the Israel of the West Bank.
03/29/2012
03:08

The Colbert ReportS8
Mitt Romney Tells a Funny Story

Mitt Romney tries to connect with blue collar voters by telling a funny story about his father laying off blue collar workers.
03/29/2012
05:33

The Colbert ReportS8
Yahweh or No Way - Christian Card Counters, Pope Benedict on Marxism & Pope Cologne

"Holy Rollers" shows the sacred side of Sin City, Pope Benedict XVI believes Marxism no longer corresponds to reality, and a perfumer honors the pope with a signature cologne.
04/02/2012
00:34

The Colbert ReportS8
Intro - 4/2/12

There's trouble in the beef industry, Pope Benedict XVI pays a visit to Cuba, and Governor Gary Johnson runs as the 2012 Libertarian candidate for president.
04/02/2012
00:06

The Colbert ReportS8
Sign Off - Goodnight

Stephen digs into a Hamlet Rove from the Colbert Super PAC Super Fun Pack.
04/02/2012
05:33

The Colbert ReportS8
Gary Johnson

Libertarian presidential candidate Governor Gary Johnson believes in fiscal conservatism and social tolerance.
04/02/2012
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
02:29

A Familiar Face Returns in Teen Wolf: The Movie

Derek Hale finds himself fighting for his life when a skilled hunter tracks down him and his son Eli in Teen Wolf: The Movie, premiering Thursday, January 26, 2023, on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

Cursed Friends
This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022
Trailer
01:22

Out of Office
Out of Office Explores Remote Work Absurdity

A young woman experiences the bizarre extremes of working from home in the film Out of Office, starring Milana Vayntrub, Ken Jeong, Jay Pharoah, Cheri Oteri, Jason Alexander and more.
09/19/2022
Trailer
00:35

South ParkS25
A Front Row Seat to South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert

Sing along to silly songs and classic symphonies from the show on South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert, premiering August 13 at 10/9c.
07/27/2022