The Colbert Report
Intro - 8/9/11
Season 7 • 08/09/2011
Record temperatures sweep the heartland, and The Cars rock out.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sport Report - Baseball's Lowest Records & MLB's Twitter Feed
Two of the grid diamond's lowest records might fall, and MLB gets in on gambling, giving Stephen control of their Twitter feed.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert Super PAC - The Heroes Respond
Stephen calls on the Colbert Nation to send in more suggestions for the direction of his Super PAC, in addition to more money.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert Super PAC - Rick Perry for President
Stephen already licked the Rick Perry for President donut, so all the other Super PAC bitches better back off.
The Colbert ReportS7 Nassir Ghaemi
Psychiatrist Nassir Ghaemi believes that mental illness can foster great leadership, but the Republican presidential candidates are too "normal."
The Colbert ReportS7 America's Credit Downgrade
The credit downgrade reduces Americans to waffle-eating Kiwis who put mayonnaise on their French fries and have a serious Hobbit infestation.
The Colbert ReportS7 Doomsday Bargain Bunkers
With three doomsday believers to a room, Vivos economy-class underground bunkers are like freshman year at Bob Jones University.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - Stephen Sniffs a Marker
Stephen gets high off a Sharpie and says goodnight.
The Colbert ReportS7 The Word - Head in the Cloud
Technology turns people into empty flesh terminals that rely on it for all their ideas, memories and relationships.
The Colbert ReportS7 Heatsteria
Part-time weather balloon Rush Limbaugh exposes the government-manufactured heat index conspiracy, while SpongeBob brainwashes kids with global warming propaganda.
The Colbert ReportS7 Ric Ocasek
The Cars' Ric Ocasek remembers the '80s music scene and promises Stephen any future Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Awards.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 8/9/11
Record temperatures sweep the heartland, the Internet doesn't make for better human beings, and legendary rockers The Cars perform.
The Colbert ReportS7 Elliot Ackerman
AmericansElect.org CEO Elliot Ackerman believes that individuals should have the power and tools to draft and directly nominate their own presidential candidate.
The Colbert ReportS7 God's Job Performance - Jim Martin
Father Jim Martin believes that God's job is sustaining the universe, but His performance can't be judged.
The Colbert ReportS7 Sign Off - E-Mailing Colbert Nation
Stephen types up e-mails on his MacBook Air and says goodnight.
The Colbert ReportS7 Intro - 8/10/11
God should improve His image, campaign fundraisers have a new weapon, and Elliot Ackerman's website matches voters with candidates.
The Colbert ReportS7 Yahweh or No Way - Mormons & God's Poll Numbers
The Mormon Church's PR campaign makes Mormons irresistibly cool, while only 52% of Americans approve of God.
The Colbert ReportS7 Hooker-Drawer Market
The New York Post explains the volatile stock market with analysis that everyone can understand.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert Super PAC - Campaign Donation Addiction
Political junkies get a fix through compulsive donations to presidential campaigns.
The Colbert ReportS7 Gloria Steinem
Gloria Steinem believes Americans know that women can do what men can do, but they don't know that men can do what women can do.
The Colbert ReportS7 Colbert Super PAC - Confused by Rick Parry with an "A" for America
The fat cat media elites in Des Moines think they can sit in their ivory corn silos and play puppet master with national politics.
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