The Colbert Report

Canton, Kansas Apology

Season 4 • 08/05/2008

Stephen apologizes to Canton, Kansas for another mix-up.

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Democrats' Five-Week Recess
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The do-nothing Democrats in Congress begin a five-week recess. If they're not passing bills, what is the president supposed to veto?
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Stephen wants you to make sure you turned off the stove, closed the refrigerator door, and locked the doors before bed.
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David Carr
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Stephen asks David Carr which is more damaging to society -- crack addiction or the New York Times.
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04:45

The Word - Divided We Win
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Congressional Republicans should think about making Corinthian columns a wedge issue.
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Starbucks Promotion
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00:33

Intro - 8/5/08
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The solution to the fuel crisis may be just around the corner. God, Stephen hopes it's a gas station.
08/05/2008
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03:18

Canton, Kansas Apology
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Stephen hopes Canton, Kansas accepts his apology because America's real assberg is Canton, South Dakota.
08/05/2008
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05:48

Spida of Love - Jason Bond
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Stephen asks Jason Bond if his spider would win in a fight with Neil Young's spider.
08/06/2008
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00:11

Spanish Audio
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If you were listening to the Spanish audio of tonight's broadcast, Stephen wants to see your green card.
08/06/2008
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03:50

Colbert Platinum - The Dribble-Down Effect
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The ultra rich consume more than they could possibly swallow, and the remainder dribbles down into their beards.
08/06/2008
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Intro - 8/6/08
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Stephen's new spider will be on this show. He'll celebrate from a distance.
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Ignorance History Month
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It is time to honor the contributions that the ignorant have made to America with an Ignorance History Month.
08/06/2008
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Kevin Costner
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Stephen wants to know if Kevin Costner is a Hollywood leftie liberal pinko Commie.
08/06/2008
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00:04

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Stephen is caught reading the latest Newsweek.
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Stephen asks Thomas Frank what the conservatives have done to make government worse.
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