The Colbert Report

Tom DeLay

Season 3 • 05/17/2007

As long as Tom DeLay doesn't go to jail, Stephen will run for President with him.

More

Watching

06:50

Howard Dean
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks Howard Dean, hypothetically, which candidate would he support: Arack Bobama or Mallory Vinton?
05/16/2007
03:59

Formidable Opponent - Peanuts
The Colbert ReportS3

President Bush is the Lucy in Chief and we have to trust his handling of the Iraq ball. Don't do it, Charlie Brown!
05/16/2007
04:18

The Word - Level Playing Field
The Colbert ReportS3

Like Rudy Giuliani, Paralympic sprinter Oscar Pistorius is simply turning a misfortune into an advantage.
05/16/2007
00:28

Intro - 5/16/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks if athletes with prosthetics should compete in the Olympics, how much time we should give the surge in Iraq, and how Howard Dean rigged the midterm elections.
05/16/2007
03:33

Second Republican Debate
The Colbert ReportS3

Republican presidential candidates --you can say you're pro-torture all you want, but actions scream louder than words.
05/16/2007
04:19

The Hammer Is Here!
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen gets fired up for his interview with Tom DeLay, and Greenpeace rebuilds Noah's ark.
05/17/2007
00:06

Sign Off - Rafters
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen lets Texas' 22nd district soar again.
05/17/2007
06:35

Randy Kearse
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks Randy Kearse, author of "Changin' Your Game Plan," if he has any advice for a certain former majority leader.
05/17/2007
00:31

Intro - 5/17/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In tonight's episode, Stephen sits down with former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay and learns the best way to use your time in prison.
05/17/2007
01:41

Baby Gun Permit
The Colbert ReportS3

A child should be at least 18 months old before he can own a gun.
05/17/2007
06:51

Tom DeLay
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks Tom DeLay, author of "No Retreat, No Surrender," how to get rid of this country's Democrat infestation.
05/17/2007
05:46

Jared Diamond
The Colbert ReportS3

Jared Diamond explains how a conflagration of agriculture and resources helped Eurasians conquer the world.
05/21/2007
05:21

Cheating Death - Internal Decapitation
The Colbert ReportS3

Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA dispenses the health advice, mostly focusing around substitutes for Vaxadrin.
05/21/2007
03:41

The Word - His Way
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen compares Paul Wolfowitz's exit from the World Bank to his own exit from The Daily Show.
05/21/2007
02:20

Presidential Fraternity
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen takes issue with Jimmy Carter for apparently growing a pair and criticizing the sitting president.
05/21/2007
02:06

God Loves a Big Screen TV
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen still believes the pope is infallible, except when it comes to his views on capitalism.
05/21/2007
00:28

Intro - 5/21/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen provides all the news, minus a little something for himself.
05/21/2007
00:35

Intro - 5/22/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen chastises the NBA for not letting their players punch people in the stands.
05/22/2007
03:12

Barack's a Liar
The Colbert ReportS3

Barack Obama's inability to remember what magazine he read when he was nine is all Stephen needs to call him a liar.
05/22/2007
01:23

Popularity Contest
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen is outraged that someone would insinuate "American Idol" is merely a popularity contest.
05/22/2007
00:15

Sign Off - Lesson Forgotten
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen learns an important lesson about writing down important lessons.
05/22/2007
You may also like5 Videos
Trailer
01:49

"South Park: Snow Day!" Trailer
South Park

Join your favorite South Park characters as they fight for neighborhood dominance during a blizzard in "South Park: Snow Day!," available now.
03/26/2024
Trailer
00:28

Make the Most of a Day Off with "South Park: Snow Day!"
South ParkS26

Join Cartman and the neighborhood kids as they battle Stan, who has his own ideas about the rules of their fantasy game, in the "South Park: Snow Day!" video game, now available to preorder.
12/21/2023
Trailer
01:00

"Star Trek: very Short Treks" Has Lightyears of Laughs
Star Trek: very Short TreksS1

Relive the classic vibe of "Star Trek: The Animated Series," and join Riker, Spock and more Starfleet faces on the bite-sized journeys of "Star Trek: very Short Treks," now streaming.
11/22/2023
Trailer
01:00

Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack

A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.
10/12/2022
Trailer
01:41

This Game of M.A.S.H. Is a Real Monster in Cursed Friends
Cursed Friends

Four pals must break an evil spell and change their fates when a classic kid's game to predict the future comes back to haunt them in the Comedy Central original movie Cursed Friends.
10/10/2022