The Colbert Report

Intro - 7/26/07

Season 3 • 07/26/2007

North Dakota seeks to legalize hemp farming. Corn won't be the only thing high as an elephant's eye.

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00:32

Intro - 7/25/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Scientists develop a removable tattoo, Fred Thompson demotes his campaign manager, and Stephen asks Charles Kaiser if there's a gay Superman.
07/25/2007
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03:40

The Word - No Regrets
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes that you should never regret a decision but instead get it tattooed on your forehead.
07/25/2007
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01:33

Thompson Campaign
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen believes America deserves a president who is ready to roll up his sleeves and get to work on a 52-ounce porterhouse.
07/25/2007
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02:46

Hometown Hero Town - Bryce Canyon City
The Colbert ReportS3

In order to establish Colbert Report City, the show will now be taped in Utah. Go Jazz!
07/25/2007
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06:00

Daily Kos
The Colbert ReportS3

Hey New York Times -- Stephen didn't spoil Harry Potter for you, don't ruin the war in Iraq for him.
07/25/2007
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05:21

Charles Kaiser
The Colbert ReportS3

When Charles Kaiser suggests that New York is a gay metropolis because of critical mass, Stephen understands that to mean it's like a dangerous nuclear bomb.
07/25/2007
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06:32

Bob Shrum
The Colbert ReportS3

Democratic campaign strategist Bob Shrum wants to know if Stephen's wrist injury has made him reconsider his position on universal health care.
07/26/2007
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06:04

Industrial Hemp & Medical Marijuana - Aaron Houston
The Colbert ReportS3

Medical marijuana advocate Aaron Houston tells Stephen the only thing you'd get from smoking hemp is the headache of your life.
07/26/2007
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03:22

Advice to the Gods - Nepalese Pre-Teen Goddesses
The Colbert ReportS3

A top Kumari -- a pre-teen girl Nepalese Buddhists worship as a goddess -- was recently stripped of her divinity for visiting the United States.
07/26/2007
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03:35

How Did Stephen Break His Wrist?
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's left wrist is in a cast, though there's some confusion about what might have caused the injury.
07/26/2007
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00:32

Intro - 7/26/07
The Colbert ReportS3

North Dakota seeks to legalize hemp farming, a goddess is stripped of her title, and Stephen asks Robert Shrum whether he advised Kerry to flip or to flop.
07/26/2007
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02:51

Wrist Violence - Glorification
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen dispels the rumor that he injured his wrist while punching out Korean strongman Kim Jong-il.
07/30/2007
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05:29

Evan Osnos
The Colbert ReportS3

Chicago Tribune's Beijing Bureau Chief, Evan Osnos, argues that the American demand for cashmere has caused pollution clouds to travel from China to American soil.
07/30/2007
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05:24

ThreatDown - Scottish Surgeons
The Colbert ReportS3

Thanks to Scottish surgeons, the only way America can protect its ports is by crossbreeding dolphins with Homeland Security director Michael Chertoff.
07/30/2007
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02:48

The Word - Solidarity
The Colbert ReportS3

By hiring the homeless to picket for them, carpenters are protesting low wages and no benefits with low wages and no benefits.
07/30/2007
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02:55

Pollution Immigration
The Colbert ReportS3

Polluted air from Asia, or "kung fumes," are taking away emphysema-related deaths from hardworking American pollutants.
07/30/2007
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00:27

Intro - 7/30/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In this episode, Stephen suggests a new picketing strategy for unions, looks at botulism in our chili and interviews Chicago Tribune's Beijing Bureau Chief, Evan Osnos.
07/30/2007
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02:24

The Word - Special Prosecutor
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen argues that if Alberto Gonzales believes what he is saying, then technically, it's not perjury.
07/31/2007
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04:54

Sport Report - Barry Bonds
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen defends Barry Bonds' alleged drug use, gambles his money away in the Saudi Arabia and Iraq soccer game and talks about a racing greyhound that's named after him.
07/31/2007
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00:38

Rupert Murdoch Purchases The Wall Street Journal
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen wonders if Rupert Murdoch has instead taken over Reuters, who were first to report the story.
07/31/2007
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02:21

Wrist Violence Epidemic
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen continues to attack films that show wrist violence and calls on Hollywood to stop showing such acts.
07/31/2007
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