The Colbert Report
America's Health Plan-Demic
Season 5 • 06/23/2009
Republicans would rather see insurance companies stand between a patient and doctor than bureaucrats.
Intro - 6/22/09The Colbert ReportS5
Stephen suggests punching randomly until we find the enemy among us, and Simon Schama writes a history of the future of America.
The Smell of Freedom - Jeff GoldblumThe Colbert ReportS5
Jeff Goldblum stands up for Zicam because nobody can take away the sweet smell of freedom.
Simon SchamaThe Colbert ReportS5
Simon Schama admits that out of all the countries' histories he's covered, the United States has the greatest.
The Enemy Within - Cane FuThe Colbert ReportS5
Like a danger pig rooting out fear truffles, Stephen profiles Mark Shuey, creator of the Cane Fu combat system turning America's seniors into killing machines.
Zicam RecallThe Colbert ReportS5
Stephen doesn't understand why the FDA would crack down on an unregulated heavy metal that you spray in your nose and can cause permanent damage.
Governor Alert - The Search for Mark SanfordThe Colbert ReportS5
As his first act as governor of South Carolina, Stephen calls off the search for Mark Sanford.
Barack Obama's Response to IranThe Colbert ReportS5
Critics call for President Obama to get involved in the Iranian elections, boldly and loudly, with the fist of the Statue of Liberty.
America's Health Plan-Demic - Howard DeanThe Colbert ReportS5
Howard Dean believes the American government can pay for a public health insurance option because it will generate more jobs.
David KilcullenThe Colbert ReportS5
David Kilcullen fights wars by taking a local approach to combat smaller guerrilla movements.
America's Health Plan-DemicThe Colbert ReportS5
The House Republicans' health care reform plan is practical in that it's practically three pages long and has no numbers.
Intro - 6/24/09The Colbert ReportS5
The Jonas Brothers don't abstain from making awesome rock, and Matthew Crawford believes in working with his hands.
Sport Report - Soccer, Tennis & Brett FavreThe Colbert ReportS5
The U.S. soccer team beats Spain, Wimbledon fights match fixing, and Brett Favre wants to join the Minnesota Vikings.
Matthew CrawfordThe Colbert ReportS5
Matthew Crawford explores the dichotomy between "knowledge" work and manual labor.
Sign Off - Random GPS Coordinate LotteryThe Colbert ReportS5
If you're at latitude 37.718 and longitude negative 102.656, you've won Stephen's random GPS coordinate lottery.
Mark Sanford Does Something InterestingThe Colbert ReportS5
Mark Sanford releases the juicy details of his torrid affair at a press conference, putting Stephen to sleep.
Jim FourattThe Colbert ReportS5
Jim Fouratt discusses the significance of the Stonewall riots for the gay rights movement and his frustration with Barack Obama.
Sign Off - One BreathThe Colbert ReportS5
Stephen made it through the whole show in one breath.
Intro - 6/25/09The Colbert ReportS5
ABC turns their network over to Barack Obama, and Jim Fouratt meets the leader of the gay shame movement.
Gay Demon on the LooseThe Colbert ReportS5
A gay demon was perfectly harmless inside a gay teen, but now it's on the prowl looking to inhabit a new host.
You may also like5 Videos
XXXI Days of Announcing the Holidays
Andrew Catalon of CBS Sports rings in the holiday season with expert commentary on the festive shows, movies and specials airing all December long!
"South Park: Snow Day!" Video Game Showcases New GameplaySouth Park
"South Park: Snow Day!" immerses players in a new art style, bringing your favorite characters to life while exploring classic locations from the show, now available to preorder in-store.
"Star Trek: very Short Treks" Has Lightyears of LaughsStar Trek: very Short TreksS1
Relive the classic vibe of "Star Trek: The Animated Series," and join Riker, Spock and more Starfleet faces on the bite-sized journeys of "Star Trek: very Short Treks," now streaming.
Fires and Full Moons Breed a New Terror on Wolf Pack
A California wildfire awakens a werewolf, but a group of curious teens -- once bitten -- will not shy away from the threat of decimation on Wolf Pack, streaming January 26 on Paramount+.