The Colbert Report

Squeaky Chair

Season 3 • 01/16/2007

Stephen's squeaky chair gets the baby grease.

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00:32

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 1/15/07

Stephen discusses plastic surgery with author Alex Kuczynski and debuts his new financial segment.
01/15/2007
04:45

The Colbert ReportS3
Alex Kuczynski

Alex Kuczynski explains why we don't look better after spending $15 billion on plastic surgery.
01/15/2007
02:40

The Colbert ReportS3
A Man's Touch

It's insensitive to remind Condoleezza Rice that she's going to die without knowing a man's touch.
01/15/2007
06:04

The Colbert ReportS3
Bears & Balls - Gas

Buy gas! It's a sure-fire commodity with no risk except for the sure risk of fire.
01/15/2007
02:25

The Colbert ReportS3
Inspired by Dr. King

Stephen calls for a national lie-in. It's time to go beyond passive resistance to pure passiveness.
01/15/2007
03:20

The Colbert ReportS3
Pesos for Pizza

Stephen is forced to rethink his three least favorite words: the Hollywood Foreign Press.
01/16/2007
03:37

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Symbolic

A symbolic Congress makes a symbolic stand against a symbolic war.
01/16/2007
00:35

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 1/16/07

Stephen begins the show with some self-aggrandizing vocal warm-ups.
01/16/2007
03:59

The Colbert ReportS3
Sport Report - Bend it Like Beckham

David Beckham comes to America to be an actor, and Stephen has the perfect project for him.
01/16/2007
06:29

The Colbert ReportS3
Dinesh D'Souza

Dinesh D'Souza believes saying that the cultural left is causing America's destruction would be going too far.
01/16/2007
01:36

The Colbert ReportS3
Squeaky Chair

Stephen is feeling a little high-strung with Bill O'Reilly's impending visit, and his chair is caught in the crossfire.
01/16/2007
05:57

The Colbert ReportS3
Better Know a District - Washington's 3rd - Brian Baird

Stephen brings clinical psychologist/Congressman Brian Baird to a safe place.
01/17/2007
06:03

The Colbert ReportS3
Lynn Swann

Hall of Famer Lynn Swann helps Stephen trash-talk the remaining NFL playoff teams that aren't the New Orleans Saints.
01/17/2007
00:38

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 1/17/07

It's Stephen's 200th show and he wants a commemorative coin.
01/17/2007
02:02

The Colbert ReportS3
200th Episode

Stephen underplays the importance of his 200th episode, as Papa Bear is making a visit tomorrow.
01/17/2007
05:17

The Colbert ReportS3
Richard Clarke

Stephen sells Richard Clarke's book with promises of robot sex.
01/17/2007
00:32

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 1/18/07

Bill O'Reilly is about to appear on The Colbert Report, regardless of whether or not you're high.
01/18/2007
04:04

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Go It Alone

Stephen is not interested in the president's new commitment to flexibility and compromise, not when he can go it alone.
01/18/2007
02:34

The Colbert ReportS3
The Advent of O'Reilly

Stephen has been spending the whole day making sure everything is perfect for his guest, Bill O'Reilly.
01/18/2007
04:12

The Colbert ReportS3
We The Mediator - Trump v. O'Donnell

Stephen is forced to side with Rosie O'Donnell over Donald Trump.
01/18/2007
02:08

The Colbert ReportS3
O'Reilly's Microwave

To honor the historic crossover of The Colbert Report and The O'Reilly Factor, Stephen steals a microwave.
01/18/2007
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