The Colbert Report
Season 9 • 04/11/2013
NASA unveils an exciting plan to nudge away an asteroid.
The Colbert ReportS9 Anthony Weiner's Comeback
After withdrawing from public life to spend more time with his penis, ex-congressman Anthony Weiner is ready to stick it back in.
The Colbert ReportS9 Navy Laser Technology
America now has a laser canon that can do anything from scorch a fast-attack boat to dazzle the enemy with a nonlethal burst.
The Colbert ReportS9 Shane Smith
VICE co-founder Shane Smith discusses his journalism adventures in Taliban-controlled areas, North Korea and labor camps.
The Colbert ReportS9 Sign Off - Laser Tag
Stephen blasts America's enemies with dollar lasers.
The Colbert ReportS9 Tip/Wag - Gun Edition - United Nations, Senate Republicans & Video Games
The NRA lobbies against a U.S.-backed gun treaty, Senate Republicans fail to filibuster background checks, and Democrat Joe Manchin blames video games for gun violence.
The Colbert ReportS9 America's Pot-astrophe - Nick Gillespie
Reason.com's editor-in-chief discusses the war on drugs, "Reefer Madness" and drug sentencing reform.
The Colbert ReportS9 Cass Sunstein
Obama's former Regulatory Affairs Administrator describes government health and safety nudges, like the USDA's "MyPlate."
The Colbert ReportS9 Times Square Mascots Ban
A Cookie Monster mascot shoves a toddler to the ground in New York City, so big government butts in with fun-stomping regulations.
The Colbert ReportS9 America's Pot-astrophe
Stoners will soon demand the civil right to marry their Mary Jane, and Republicans surrender their values for the youth vote.
The Colbert ReportS9 NASA Lasso
Rope is the most advanced technology NASA can afford to fight Earth's space enemies.
The Colbert ReportS9 Tip/Wag - Brood II Cicadas, Sexcereal & GOP Internet Memes
Scientists predict a plague, Canada makes the world's most passionate cereal, and the NRCC redesigns its website.
The Colbert ReportS9 Intro - 4/16/13
What the Boston Marathon terrorists really don't get is that they attacked an unshakable group of people who run 26 miles until their nipples are raw on their day off.
The Colbert ReportS9 Rollie Eggmaster
One product provides an answer to the question, "How can I make my breakfast fit more snugly into my colon?"
The Colbert ReportS9 Caroline Kennedy
"Poems to Learn by Heart" author Caroline Kennedy encourages people to steal her book with their minds.
The Colbert ReportS9 Ricin Letters & Boston Bombing Suspects
Someone tries to poison Obama, and a major breakthrough occurs in the reporting of all the things people don't know yet about the Boston bombings.
The Colbert ReportS9 Bitcoin Plunge - Adam Davidson
The host of NPR's "Planet Money" describes what shady people do with bitcoins.
The Colbert ReportS9 Alan Cumming
Alan Cumming discusses Broadway's production of "Macbeth," set in a psychiatric unit.
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