The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

Moving Private Ryan

Season 9 • 08/18/2004

President Bush's plan to move troops around will win the wars of the 21st century.

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01:09

High on the Olympics
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

The internet and news sources have ruined the excitement of the Olympics for Jon Stewart.
08/17/2004
03:33

GOV Story
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Homosexual Governor Jim McGreevey and his wife are still working on the issues they have to work on.
08/17/2004
04:57

Don't Mess With Don't Mess With Texas
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

The popular slogan Don't Mess With Texas was originally aimed at litter prevention but now appears on tons of future litter.
08/17/2004
07:16

Senator Norm Coleman
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Senator Norm Coleman went from being a Jewish Democrat in Brooklyn to a Republican in Minnesota.
08/17/2004
05:23

A Round of Shots
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Ed Helms wonders if there is anything more terrifying than a bar full of people without guns.
08/18/2004
02:58

Tough Cell
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Laura Bush attacks stem cell research proponents as sellers of false hope.
08/18/2004
00:18

Moment of Zen - Torch
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

A woman holding a torch slides down a wire to a stage in Times Square.
08/18/2004
01:16

Intro - Muqtada al-Sadr
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Muqtada al-Sadr decides to throw away the militia and join the political process.
08/18/2004
05:07

Burt Reynolds
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Burt Reynolds tells Jon how they cast the stuttering rapist in "Deliverance."
08/18/2004
02:25

To the Bapt Cave!
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Archaeologists excavate a cave that may be the site of many of the baptisms performed by John the Baptist -- or as he was known to his friends -- Johnny Wet Fingers.
08/18/2004
01:08

Moving Private Ryan
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

President Bush announces the troops will finally be coming home, but not the troops you're thinking of and not for another ten years.
08/18/2004
05:11

Seth Green
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Seth Green and Jon talk about blinged-out bears and your civic duty.
08/19/2004
03:18

Indecision 2004 Peaceful Protest Discount
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Mayor Bloomberg embarks on an ambitious program to reward peaceful protestors with cheaper fast food.
08/19/2004
01:23

The Colbert Report
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

On the Colbert Report, top leaders check in, but they don't check out.
08/19/2004
01:51

Swift Boat Veterans for Revenge
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

John Kerry and everyone else on the swift boats, save Larry Thurlow, were pussies.
08/19/2004
03:21

Back in Black Olympic Fever
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Bush uses the Olympics to remind us that democracy will triumph over terror.
08/19/2004
03:21

Indecision 2004 Crowd Control
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Both John Kerry and George W. Bush take advantage of biased and pre-organized crowds to deflect them from actually having to answer questions.
08/19/2004
00:12

Moment of Zen -Too Good To Be True
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

George W. Bush gets lauded by a handpicked and prescreened health savings account investor.
08/19/2004
00:34

Next Week 8/23/04
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Stephen Colbert dons a Viking helmet and sings in a girlish squeal to a stranger in a parking lot.
08/19/2004
03:16

Kerry Controversy
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

In the midst of a sex tour of Southeast Asia, Rob Corddry takes time to not share his opinion on John Kerry's war record.
08/23/2004
01:01

John Kerry And A Free Bike
The Daily Show with Jon StewartS9

Audience disbelief not withstanding, John Kerry will be on the show tomorrow night.
08/23/2004
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