The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Doctor's Orders

Season 3 • 08/15/2007

Stephen is forced to wear an e-collar for medical reasons.

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01:20

The Colbert ReportS3
DNA: Could It Happen To You? - Incrimination

Stephen discovers he is the next in a long line of famous people who have DNA.
08/14/2007
06:22

The Colbert ReportS3
Jerry Miller

DNA freed Jerry Miller after 26 years in prison. Stephen presents him with a card.
08/14/2007
05:27

The Colbert ReportS3
Dr. Spencer Wells

Stephen's grandfather collected over 100,000 issues of National Geographic
08/14/2007
05:58

The Colbert ReportS3
DNA: Could It Happen To You? - Jackknife

When a tanker truck full of Formula 401 jackknifes, Stephen decides to learn more about DNA.
08/14/2007
03:35

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Potential

Alberto Gonzales could become a one-man justice system, like RoboCop.
08/15/2007
01:45

The Colbert ReportS3
Jewish Colbert Ancestry

If Stephen's Jewish grandmother had testicles, she would be his Jewish grandfather.
08/15/2007
05:37

The Colbert ReportS3
Michael Wallis

Michael Wallis is the author of "The Lincoln Highway," which goes from San Francisco to Times Square. Stephen assumes it's for shuttling gay people to Broadway musicals.
08/15/2007
00:30

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 8/15/07

In tonight's episode, Stephen discusses driving with author Michael Wallis, and Alberto Gonzales gets the power to fast track executions.
08/15/2007
01:46

The Colbert ReportS3
Monkey on the Lam - Oliver

Beware! A monkey escaped from the Tupelo Zoo after he picked the lock to his cage again.
08/15/2007
05:51

The Colbert ReportS3
Markos Moulitsas

Stephen catches Markos Moulitsas, founder of DailyKos.com, in a truly hateful position.
08/15/2007
00:44

The Colbert ReportS3
Sign Off - Doctor's Orders

Stephen thinks the e-collar his doctor instructed him to wear is totally unnecessary.
08/15/2007
05:17

The Colbert ReportS3
Andrew Keen

Andrew Keen, author of "The Cult of the Amateur," believes the Internet has replaced professionals with amateurs. It's certainly true of porn.
08/16/2007
00:31

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 8/16/07

In tonight's episode, Stephen sits down with author Andrew Keen and takes a look at the Iowa Straw Poll.
08/16/2007
06:48

The Colbert ReportS3
Mike Huckabee

Thanks to the Colbert Bump, Governor Mike Huckabee will be the next President of the United States.
08/16/2007
04:05

The Colbert ReportS3
Cheating Death - Gene Therapy

Gene therapy will cure our most devastating health problems -- like erectile dysfunction in mice.
08/16/2007
02:40

The Colbert ReportS3
Colbert-Branson Trainwreck

Stephen tries to quiet rumors about the most explosive interview of the year -- The Colbert-Branson Trainwreck.
08/16/2007
00:44

The Colbert ReportS3
WristStrong Bracelets

Stephen's audience has been given WristStrong bracelets with instruction to surrender them to anyone they meet who is famous.
08/20/2007
03:08

The Colbert ReportS3
The Word - Made in Iraq

Stephen thinks we should make all our stuff in Iraq, and use the Iraqi model on every country that has something he wants.
08/20/2007
00:32

The Colbert ReportS3
Intro - 8/20/07

In tonight's episode, Stephen sits down with LEGO artist Nathan Sawaya and takes a look at the people who are keeping our borders safe.
08/20/2007
04:39

The Colbert ReportS3
Nathan Sawaya

Stephen asks Nathan Sawaya if becoming a LEGO artist was the best way he could think of to tell his parents to go to hell.
08/20/2007
06:26

The Colbert ReportS3
Nailed 'Em - Northern Border

The northern border patrol is working at keeping out Canadian drug fiends.
08/20/2007
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