The Colbert Report

Sign Off - Doctor's Orders

Season 3 • 08/15/2007

Stephen is forced to wear an e-collar for medical reasons.

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01:20

DNA: Could It Happen To You? - Incrimination
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen discovers he is the next in a long line of famous people who have DNA.
08/14/2007
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06:22

Jerry Miller
The Colbert ReportS3

DNA freed Jerry Miller after 26 years in prison. Stephen presents him with a card.
08/14/2007
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05:27

Dr. Spencer Wells
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's grandfather collected over 100,000 issues of National Geographic
08/14/2007
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05:58

DNA: Could It Happen To You? - Jackknife
The Colbert ReportS3

When a tanker truck full of Formula 401 jackknifes, Stephen decides to learn more about DNA.
08/14/2007
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03:35

The Word - Potential
The Colbert ReportS3

Alberto Gonzales could become a one-man justice system, like RoboCop.
08/15/2007
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01:45

Jewish Colbert Ancestry
The Colbert ReportS3

If Stephen's Jewish grandmother had testicles, she would be his Jewish grandfather.
08/15/2007
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05:37

Michael Wallis
The Colbert ReportS3

Michael Wallis is the author of "The Lincoln Highway," which goes from San Francisco to Times Square. Stephen assumes it's for shuttling gay people to Broadway musicals.
08/15/2007
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00:30

Intro - 8/15/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In tonight's episode, Stephen discusses driving with author Michael Wallis, and Alberto Gonzales gets the power to fast track executions.
08/15/2007
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01:46

Monkey on the Lam - Oliver
The Colbert ReportS3

Beware! A monkey escaped from the Tupelo Zoo after he picked the lock to his cage again.
08/15/2007
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05:51

Markos Moulitsas
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen catches Markos Moulitsas, founder of DailyKos.com, in a truly hateful position.
08/15/2007
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00:44

Sign Off - Doctor's Orders
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen thinks the e-collar his doctor instructed him to wear is totally unnecessary.
08/15/2007
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05:17

Andrew Keen
The Colbert ReportS3

Andrew Keen, author of "The Cult of the Amateur," believes the Internet has replaced professionals with amateurs. It's certainly true of porn.
08/16/2007
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00:31

Intro - 8/16/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In tonight's episode, Stephen sits down with author Andrew Keen and takes a look at the Iowa Straw Poll.
08/16/2007
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06:48

Mike Huckabee
The Colbert ReportS3

Thanks to the Colbert Bump, Governor Mike Huckabee will be the next President of the United States.
08/16/2007
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04:05

Cheating Death - Gene Therapy
The Colbert ReportS3

Gene therapy will cure our most devastating health problems -- like erectile dysfunction in mice.
08/16/2007
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02:40

Colbert-Branson Trainwreck
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen tries to quiet rumors about the most explosive interview of the year -- The Colbert-Branson Trainwreck.
08/16/2007
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00:44

WristStrong Bracelets
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen's audience has been given WristStrong bracelets with instruction to surrender them to anyone they meet who is famous.
08/20/2007
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03:08

The Word - Made in Iraq
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen thinks we should make all our stuff in Iraq, and use the Iraqi model on every country that has something he wants.
08/20/2007
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00:32

Intro - 8/20/07
The Colbert ReportS3

In tonight's episode, Stephen sits down with LEGO artist Nathan Sawaya and takes a look at the people who are keeping our borders safe.
08/20/2007
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04:39

Nathan Sawaya
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks Nathan Sawaya if becoming a LEGO artist was the best way he could think of to tell his parents to go to hell.
08/20/2007
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06:26

Nailed 'Em - Northern Border
The Colbert ReportS3

The northern border patrol is working at keeping out Canadian drug fiends.
08/20/2007
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