- HELLO.

TODAY, WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUTTHE CANING OF CHARLES SUMNER.

[chuckles]

- IN THE MIDDLE OF THE 1800s,KANSAS IS UP FOR WHETHER OR NOT

IT'S GOING TO BE A SLAVE STATEOR A FREE STATE.

CHARLES SUMNER IS A SENATOR,AN ANTI-SLAVERY RADICAL.

AND CHARLES SUMNER GIVESA SPEECH ENTITLED

"THE CRIME AGAINST KANSAS."

HE BASICALLY SAYS,KANSAS IS BEING RAPED BY

THE PERPETUATORS OF SLAVERYWHO WANT IT TO BE A SLAVE STATE.

THEN HE STARTS MAKINGPERSONAL ATTACKS.

HE SAYS, OH, ANDREW BUTLER,FROM SOUTH CAROLINA,

WHO NORMALLY SITS NEXT TO ME,BUT UH-OH, YOU HAD A STROKE.

YOU ARE NOT HERE.

GUESS WHAT?YOU ARE A [bleep] PIMP

FOR THE PROSTITUTE OF SLAVERY.

OH, YOU KNOW WHO'SIN THE CHAMBER THAT DAY?

PRESTON BROOKS, REPRESENTATIVE,SOUTH CAROLINA.

ANDREW BUTLER'S SECOND COUSIN.

HE'S LIKE, THIS DUDE IS [bleep]SLANDERING MY STATE.

HE'S SLANDERING MY FAMILY.

AND HE SAYS, UHHH.

[blows raspberry]

AND THE SOUTHERNCODE OF HONOR.

I CAN'T LET THIS [bleep] JUST[bleep] TRANSPIRE.

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

I CAN'T CHALLENGE HIM TO A DUELBECAUSE ONLY GENTLEMEN DUEL,

AND CHARLES SUMNER'SIS NO GENTLEMAN.

OH, [bleep].

I WAS JUST GIVENA BRAND-NEW

11 1/2 OUNCEGUTTA-PERCHA CANE

WITH A GOLD HEAD.I'LL BEAT HIM WITH THAT.

MAY 22, 1856.

HE WALKS DOWNTHE AISLE OF THE SENATE.

HE'S FIVE [bleep] FEETFROM CHARLES SUMNER

AND HE LOOKS UPAND HE REALIZES

THERE'S A LADYIN THE CHAMBER.

HE'S LIKE, OH, [bleep].

I CAN'T BEAT CHARLES SUMNERIN FRONT OF A LADY

AND HE SITS ACROSS THE AISLE.HE LEAVES.

HE'S LIKE,NO, I'M NOT DOING THIS THING.

AND THEN EVERYONE'S JUST LIKE,YOU GOT TO DO THE THING,

AND HE WALKS BACK IN.

[bleep] CHARLES SUMNER,HE'S NEAR-SIGHTED.

HE'S LIKE, OH,THAT'S ALL BLURRY AND [bleep].

[bleep] PRESTON BROOKS IS LIKE,

I READ YOUR SPEECH TWICE,AND GUESS WHAT?

IT'S A [bleep] LIBELAGAINST SOUTH CAROLINA

AND IT'S A LIBELAGAINST ANDREW BUTLER.

AND GUESS WHAT?

HE'S A [bleep] COUSIN OF MINE.

AND WHACK!

BEATS HIM SO HARDON THE [bleep] TOP OF THE HEAD

THAT HE GOES BLIND.

LAURENCE KEITT COMES IN.

LET THEM BE, HE SAID.

AND HE WAS LIKE, NO, NO, NO.EVERYBODY SITS TOGETHER.

BLACK PERSON THERE,WHITE PERSON THERE.

THEN BLACK PERSON THERE,THEN WHITE PERSON THERE.

BE FRIENDS.

QUIT BEING ASS[bleep].

JUST BE FRIENDS.

THEN HE RULED THAT BLACKTEACHERS HAVE TO BE PAID

THE SAME AS WHITE TEACHERS,WHICH IS, UH CRAZY.

THE NEXT REALLY BIG ONE,

HE RULED BLACK PEOPLE ARE NOWALLOWED TO VOTE IN PRIMARIES.

AND THAT JUST, LIKE,SET CHARLESTON ON FIRE.

SOMEONE THREW A BRICKTHROUGH THEIR WINDOW ONE NIGHT.

THE KKK BURNED A CROSSON THEIR LAWN.

IT GOT SO BAD,THERE WAS A PETITION

THAT 21,000 PEOPLE SIGNEDTHAT SAID HEY, WARINGS,

HERE'S $10,000.TAKE THIS AND MOVE ANYWHERE.

THEY'RE LIKE, NO WE STILL HAVEWORK TO DO HERE, YOU KNOW.

[bleep] YOU.

AND THENBRIGGS V. ELLIOT HAPPENED.

THURGOOD MARSHALL TRYINGTO PROVE BLACK KIDS

ARE NOT GETTING THE SAMEEDUCATION AS WHITE KIDS.

AND THERE WERE THREE JUDGES.

ONE OF THEM WAS WATIES WARINGAND THE OTHER TWO WERE LIKE,

YEAH, SEGREGATION IS GREAT,

EVERYTHING ABOUT THISIS AMAZING,

SO WHO CARESIF THEY'RE EQUAL?

SO THEY LOST AND SCHOOLS WERENOT INTEGRATED IN THE SOUTH.

WATIES IS LIKE WELL, I'M NOTGOING DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT.

AND HE WRITESTHIS 20-PAGE DISSENT.

BASICALLY WHAT HE SAID WAS,EVERYONE IN CHARLESTON

IS AN ASS[bleep].

YOU CANNOT BE OKAYWITH THE FACT

THAT BLACK PEOPLE ARE SEPARATEFROM WHITE PEOPLE.

THIS IS A NICE TOWN.

I GREW UP HERE MY ENTIRE LIFE.

WHY DO WE PUNISHHALF OUR CITIZENS?

STOP PUNISHING THEM.

JUST BE NICE.

#BENICE, YOU KNOW?

AND THAT WAS IT.

AND THEY MOVED TO NEW YORK.

MAN, CAN I JUST TELL YOU GUYSHOW HAPPY I AM

TO NOT BE AS THROW-UPPYAS I WAS, LIKE, 45 MINUTES AGO?

- THAT [bleep] SUCKED SO BAD.[laughs]

THE OFFICERS TURNEDTO ROBERT SMALLS

AND THEY WERE LIKE,LISTEN MAN.

DON'T TELL ANYONEWE'RE GOING TO GO ONSHORE.

KEEP AN EYE ON THE SHIPWHILE WE'RE GONE.

AND ROBERT SMALLS IS LIKE,SURE MAN,

I [bleep] GOT THIS.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRYABOUT ME.

AND ROBERT SMALLS THOUGHTTO HIMSELF,

THESE GUYS JUST WENTTO GO GET SOME HOOKERS.

THESE TWO OTHER GUYS,

WHO AREN'TTHE GUYS GETTING HOOKERS,

ALSO WENT TO GET HOOKERS.

I BASICALLY HAVE THIS SHIPTO MYSELF.

HE SAYS, HEY MAN.

THIS IS THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITYFOR US TO STEAL THIS SHIP

AND GET OVERTO THE UNION SIDE.

HERE'S WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO.

GO GET MY FAMILYAND GO ROUND UP THE FAMILY

OF THE OTHER TWO SEAMENON THIS VESSEL.

AND I WILL BRING ALL OF USTO FREEDOM.

[laughter]

- MARK.- WHAT?

- REMEMBER ATTHE BEGINNING OF THIS

YOU SAID YOU WERENOT GOING TO--

- I PROMISED YOU I WAS NOT GOINGTO LAY ON MY STOMACH TONIGHT.

- AND WHAT HAPPENED?

- PROBABLY THIS.

I'M FIGHTING.HERE I COME.

- CUE EYE OF THE TIGER.- ALL RIGHT.

I ONLY DO THISIN HONOR OF ROBERT SMALLS.

[groan] GOD DAMN IT,WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT?

ONCE ROBERT SMALLSHAD TAKEN CONTROL OF THE SHIP,

SMALLS THOUGHT TO HIMSELF,

I'M STILL GOING TO HAVE TO MAKEIT PAST FIVE CONFEDERATE FORTS.

LUCKILY, I LOOK ENOUGH LIKETHE CAPTAIN

WHEN I WEAR THE HATAND THIS JACKET.

AND I HAVETHE CONFEDERATE CODE BOOK,

WHICH MEANS I KNOWWHAT SIGNALS TO THROW

THAT WILL GET USTHROUGH THE HARBOR.

SO ROBERT SMALLS ISPILOTING THE SHIP

PAST CONFEDERATE TROOPS.

SO HE GOT TO THE FIRST ONEAND WAS LIKE, TOOT-TOOT-TOOT.

AND THEY THOUGHT THERE'S A WHITEGUY TRYING TO PASS THROUGH.

LET'S JUST WAVE AT HIM.

AND HE MADE IT THROUGH.

[exhales]

[chuckle]

[exclaims]

ALL RIGHT.

SO HE MADE IT THROUGHFIVE CONFEDERATE SIGNALS

ALL THE WAY THROUGHTO THE GATES OF FORT SUMTER.

NOT ONLY DID THE GUYSAT FORT SUMTER SAY,

ALL RIGHT, LET'S LETTHE PLANTER THROUGH,

THE GUARDAT FORT SUMTER SAID,

HEY, YOU GO KILL YOURSELVESA COUPLE OF YANKEES.

AND IT WAS ONLY AT DAWNTHAT THE CONFEDERATES REALIZE,

HEY, MAYBE THIS ISN'T QUITEON THE LEVEL.

AND THEY START LOBBINGCANNON FIRE

AND AS HE IS BARRELINGTOWARD UNION FORCES,

HE THINKS, OH MY GOD.

I'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHINGTO MAKE SURE

THAT THESE UNION FORCESDON'T THINK

I AM COMING TO CONFRONT THEM.