The In Addition Tos

  • Season 3, Ep 5
  • 02/10/2015

Bobby assembles an elite team of friends to rescue his mother from Eagle Wing, C-Czar and Liz try dating other people, and Mikey questions his sexuality.

- OH, MY GOD, I THINK I'M GOINGINTO LABOR AT THIS POINT.

- WHAT IS IT?- IT'S A TOILET BABY.

- SO I KNOW IT'S MINE.

- BORN INTO THE TOILET.

- HERE'S WHAT'S GOINGTO HAPPEN, C-CZAR.

YOU NEED TO GET A JOB.

YOU NEED TO FINDA PLACE TO LIVE.

I'M INCLINED TO DRUG TEST YOU.

- I HAVE TO GET SERIOUS NOW

'CAUSE OF THE EXISTING REALITIESOF MY LIFE.

WHAT'S UP?

I'M C-CZAR,DISENFRANCHISED FATHER.

I LOVE MY BABY SO MUCH.

[toilet flushes]

[baby cries]

OH, YOU DON'T LIKE THAT,DO YOU?

- TODAY WE'RE HERE TO DETERMINEYOUR CUSTODY.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

- YOU KNOW,I TAKE CARE OF PINNOCHLIO...

- HIS NAME IS SKYLORD.- HIS NAME IS PINNOCHLIO.

- OKAY, HIS NAME IS SKYLORD.- SO IT'S AMICABLE?

WHAT ARE YOU BOTHLOOKING FOR HERE?

- SHE'S JUST PISSED'CAUSE I WON'T EAT HER [bleep]

WHEN SHE WANTS!

- WELL, FOR ME IT'S LIKEWHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOME

TAKING CARE OF OUR SONIF YOU'RE NOT GONNA STRAIGHT UP,

LIKE, LAP UP ON MY STAR HOLE.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

- YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOTA THERAPY SESSION HERE TODAY.

I AM GOING TO RECOMMENDCOUPLES COUNSELING

FOR THE TWO OF YOU WITHMY GOOD FRIEND RON FUNCHES.

I THINK YOU COULD BENEFITFROM IT.

- YEAH, I COULD [bleep]WITH RON FUNCHES.

- IF HE GETS 3,000 HOURSOF PRACTICING AS A THERAPIST

IN ADDITION TO GRAD SCHOOL,

HE WILL BECOMEA LICENSED THERAPIST.

- IS HE NOT A FULL THERAPISTYET?

- HE'S A THERAPIST IN TRAINING,AND HE WILL GET HIS LICENSE,

AND YOU WILL HELP HIMGET THE HOURS.

- WELL, I MEAN, THIS IS JUST ANEW FACET OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

YOU GUYS WILL ALWAYS BE PARENTS.

- I'M, LIKE, MAD AT HIM THOUGH.

- IT'S LIKE, WE'RE NOT EVENTOGETHER,

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

- NO, LIKE, WE'RE NOT.IT'S LIKE I'M NOT WITH YOU.

- NO?- MM-MM.

- SO YOU GUYS AREN'T TOGETHER?

- MM-MM, WE'RE NOT TOGETHER.

NO.MM-MM.

- WELL, WHAT WE'RE SEEING HERE

IS A LOT OF PASSION,AND THEN ANGER...

- NO, I'M NOT GONNA GO DOWNON YOU IN FRONT OF RON FUNCHES.

- YOU GUYS ARE ENTRENCHEDIN AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP,

AND I THINK IT'S GONNABE MY OPINION THAT YOU

START SEEING OTHER PEOPLE.

- ALL RIGHT, LISTEN, LIKE,MAYBE, LIKE,

WE SHOULD GO ON A DATE

AND JUST, LIKE,SEE WHAT IT'S LIKE.

- LIKE, WITH EACH OTHER?

- NO.- NO.

[dramatic music]

- AS SOME OF YOU ALREADY KNOW,MY BEAUTIFUL--

[sobs]

[softly]MY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER...

- BOBBY.

- WAS RECENTLY KIDNAPPEDBY THE SEXUALLY CHARISMATIC

YET UNDENIABLY EVIL EAGLEWING.

- [laughs]

- SO WHAT'S THE PLAN, BOBBY B?

HOW DO WE GOAND GET YOUR MOTHER BACK?

- THIS IS THE PLAN.

I'VE WRITTEN IT OUT INSPECIAL CHALK,

SO IF THE POLICE EVER SHOW UP,

THEY'LL BE LIKE,"OH, VERY COOL, VERY COOL."

THE GIGOLO HOUSEIS A VERITABLE FORTRESS

WITH MANY GIGOLO ROAMINGTHE PERIMETER FOR CARDIO.

THESE GIGOLOS ARE EQUIPMENTEDWITH AN AK-47, AN M-480,

AND AN OK-UBN ME?

- OK-UBN ME.

- OKAY, I'LL BE IN YOU.

[laughter]

THIS SATURDAY,

THERE'S A WHITE-HOTBACHE-LORETTE PARTY

HAPPENING AT THEIR POOL.

PRETEND LESBIANS, YOUR JOBIS TO RING THE DOORBELL

AND SAY THAT YOU'VE JUST MOVEDINTO THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

- NEIGHBORS.

- I'M TELLING YOU, THESE GIGOLO

ARE [bleep] MONSTERSWITH AMAZING HAIR,

BUT THEY WILL RELAXIF THEY FIND OUT

THAT A WOMAN DOESN'T HAVETO BE A SEXUAL CONQUEST.

ALL OF THIS TEAMWORK WILL ALLOWME TO SLITHER INSIDE THE HOUSE

AND GET MYSELF UPSTAIRSAND GET MY MOTHER BACK.

- BOBBY?

- BUT BEFORE I DO THAT,I GOT TO MAKE MY WAY

THROUGH THIS WHITE-HOTBACHE-LORETTE PARTY.

- BRO,THAT'S PRACTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE.

HOW YOU GONNA DO THAT?

- JUST LIKE RICHARD GRIECODID IN THE LATE '80s.

I'M GONNA [bleep] MY WAYTHROUGH.

- OH.

- OH, SMART.

[dramatic music]

- YES, BECAUSE I WANTED ADVICE.

- OH, I MISREAD THAT EMAIL.

[bleep!

- I'M EXPERIMENTING BUT THATDOESN'T MEAN I WANT TO MAKE LOVE

TO EVERY MAN I MEET.

- AH, [bleep].

[bleep].

I JUST GET CATFISHED SO MUCH.

- [chuckles]

- COME ON, LET'S GET OUTOF HERE.

- NO, STOP IT.- COME ON.

COME ON YOU LITTLE TEASE.STOP BEING A TEASE.

- I'M NOT BEING A TEASE.- YOU ARE.

YOU'RE BEING A LITTLE TEASE.- I'M NOT BEING A TEASE.

- [bleep], MAN.- STOP IT.

- IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY, OKAY.

YOU EMAIL ME.YOU SAID THAT YOU'RE BI NOW.

I JUMPED IN A ZIP CAR.DROVE ALL THE WAY UP HERE.

SO NOW I'M STUCK IN CANADAWITH NO ONE TO JERK ME OFF.

JUST A BUNCH OF FREE GOVERNMENTSERVICES, LAX DRUG LAWS,

BEAUTIFUL SCENERY.

ACTUALLY, I LIKE IT UP HERE.

I THINK I MIGHT STAY.

AND I JUST READ AN ARTICLETHAT THE MIDDLE CLASS HERE

IS ACTUALLY THRIVING,

WHERE IN AMERICAIT'S A REAL STRUGGLE.

YOU GOT MY INFO?- YEAH.

- HIT ME UP IF YOU WANTTO SUCK ON A REAL CHUBSTER.