Zapped - Uncensored

  • Season 1 , Ep 3
  • 02/03/2003
  • Views: 153,906

On Dave's previous show, he found out that not everyone appreciates a good prank. (3:27)

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LOOK OUT, JAMIE KENNEDY !

THERE'S A NEW VIDEOPRANKSTER IN TOWN,

AND HE GOES BYTHE NAME, DAVE CHAPPELLE !

ZAPPED !

WATCH THE LOOKON THESE KIDS' FACES

WHEN DAVE TELLS THEM THEIRPARENTS ARE DEAD.

HOW'RE YOU KIDS DOING ?

WELL, KIDS,A DOCTOR'S JOB IS HARD,

AND IT NEVER GETS HARDERTHAN TELLING YOU GUYS

THAT YOUR PARENTS ARE DEAD.

( children crying )

( laughing )

FOSTER CARE ISCOMING TO PICK YOU GUYS UP,

AND SOMEBODY'S GONNA ADOPT YOU,RIGHT LIKE THIS !

I WOULD.

ALL RIGHT, GUYS,BE GOOD.

BE GOOD TO EACH OTHER.

HOPEFULLY, THEY DON'TSPLIT YOU UP.

ALL RIGHT, TAKE CARE.

OH, BY THE WAY,I FORGOT TO TELL YOU...

PSYCH !

I'M JUST KIDDING,COME ON OUT, MOM AND DAD,

COME ON OUT.

WHY DID YOU DOTHIS TO US ?

Y'ALL BEEN ZAPPED !

LOOK OUT, AMERICA,

'CAUSE WHEN DAVE CHAPPELLE'SAROUND, YOU MIGHT GET ZAPPED !

JULIE !

WHAT UP, PLAYBOY ?

DAMN IT, HOW COULDYOU DO THIS TO ME ?

YOU'VE WASTED EIGHT YEARSOF MY LIFE !

OH, COME ON, MAN,WITH ALL THAT SHOUTING.

DAVE CHAPPELLE ?

JEEZ, JULIE, WHY DON'TYOU JUST FUCK J.J. ?

J.J. ?

I AIN'T J.J.,BUT IT WAS DYN-O-MITE !

WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT,

I'VE BEEN SLEEPING WITHMY SECRETARY

FOR THE LASTTHREE AND A HALF YEARS.

WHAT ?

THIS WASN'T REAL,THIS WAS FAKE !

WELL, WHAT'S THATIN HIS PANTS ?

IT'S A DILDO, DAWG !

YOU HAVEBEEN ZAPPED !

DAVE CHAPPELLE, YOU HAVERUINED MY LIFE !

( laughing )

( cheering and applauding )

NOW, THE NEXT ONE ISTHE ONE THAT REALLY

GOT ME IN A LOT MORE TROUBLE.

THIS IS WHEN THE HEATGOT TURNED UP.

OBSERVE.

ZAPPED !

ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY,GET ON THE FUCKING FLOOR !

THIS IS A ROBBERY !

HEY, HEY, HEY,HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY !

STAY COOL, BIG TIME,STAY COOL !

DON'T YOU MOVE, BABY !

YOU'VE GOT 20 SECONDS TOFILL THIS BAG WITH CASH.

I DON'T WANNASEE A PEEP OUTTA YOU.

HEY, BIG TIME, WHAT YOU LOOKINGAT MY FACE FOR ?

THAT'S AGAINSTTHE PROTOCOL OF ROBBERY !

YOU THINK IT'SA FUCKIN' GAME ?

SHOOT THIS MOTHERFUCKA.

( shooting )

( barking )

PLEASE, I HAVE A FAMILY.

OH, YOU GOTA FAMILY ?

WELL, GUESS WHAT ?

I EAT COTTAGE CHEESEFOR DINNER, ALL RIGHT ?

WITH SALTAND PEPPER.

YOU UNDERSTAND ?

NOW, I'M GETTINGOUTTA HERE.

I WANNA TELLY'ALL SOMETHING...

YOU'VE BEEN ZAPPED !

( laughing )

FREEZE, RIGHT THERE !

LOOK, WE JUSTDOING A SHOW--

OW !

DAMN, I GOT HIT !

I DIDN'T HAVENOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.

SORRY.

BE PREPAREDTO GET ZAPPED

THURSDAYS AT 8:30.

THIS FALL,ON THE W.B. !

♪ MAMMY ♪

( moaning )

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