Rap Battle Hype Man

  • Season 3 , Ep 1
  • 09/18/2013
  • Views: 96,601

A freestyle rapper's attempt to challenge the reigning champion goes off the rails when his crew experiences some internal conflict. (3:19)

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EVERY DAY IN THE MONTH OFFEBRUARY, Y'ALL.

YO, I'M YOUR HOST,BIG PEEP-PAROO!

all: R-R-R-ROO!- THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT,

THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT.TO MY LEFT, WE GOT THE CHAMPION.

YO, INTRODUCE, SON!- YEAH, WHAT'S HAPPENIN'?

THIS YOUR BOY, RHINO D,AND I'M ABOUT TO FRONTHAND...

BACKHAND HIS ASSOFF THE MIC!

- THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT,THAT'S RIGHT.

AND ON MY RIGHT,WE GOT THE CHALLENGER.

INTRODUCE YOURSELF, PLAYA.- YEAH, WHAT'S UP, MAN?

I'M DILLER KILLER,IN THE HOUSE.

100 USDA PURE MEAT.NO FILLER RIGHT HERE, DAWG.

- HOO! HOO! [barks]- OKAY, OKAY.

YO, DILLER LOST THE TOSS,SO YOU GO FIRST.

OKAY, GENTLEMEN,BATTLE RAP!

- ALL RIGHT, YEAH.NOW, HERE WE GO.

YOU'RE SHOOK, SON.I'M GONNA EAT YOU FOR BREAKFAST.

'CAUSE I'M A COOK, SON.- HA HA!

I STOLE A COP-A-FEELFROM YOUR GIRL'S BREASTESES!

- YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

- [high-pitched growling]

- WAIT A MINUTE.GET BACK.

- [growling continues]

- HE DON'T EVEN KNOW, MAN.HEY, LISTEN, MAN.

YOU CAN'T EVEN WINTHIS 100-YARD DASH,

BUT LET ME ASK YOUA QUESTION.

WHAT DO THEY CALL THAT,A MOUSTACHE?

all: OHH...

- [growling]

AAAAH!

AAH!- NO, MAN, SEE--

RELAX, MAN. HEY, I NEED YOUTO RELAX A LITTLE BIT.

- [growling]

- TAKE IT DOWNA LITTLE BIT.

- AHHHHHH...- WHAT THE [bleep] YOU DOIN'?

I'M TELLING YOU, TAKE--CAN YOUTAKE IT DOWN A LITTLE BIT, MAN?

- [growls quieter]

- COME ON, WHAT ARE YOU,A HORSE? LIKE...

- AAAAH!- THAT'S THE LAST ONE.

YO, WHAT'S UP, DAWG?YOU KNOW, MY [bleep] IS RICH.

I'M SWIMMIN' IN SIMOLEONS.

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITHTHIS MINIATURE BLACK NAPOLEON?

- [growling]

- YEAH, ALL RIGHT.

YO! HEY, MAN.

HEY, DAWG,GET YOUR--HEY, HEY!

NOW--COME ON, NOW.DON'T GET MY EYES WET.

HEY, HEY, GET YOUR BOY--

- WAAAAAAH!- YO, I'M SORRY.

LOOK AT THAT. LOOK AT THIS.LOOK AT THIS.

LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT.OH, OH, YEAH.

GO GET IT, NOW.THAT'S A BOY. OH.

YEAH, MAN! HERE WE GO!YEAH, MAN, LOOK AT THAT CHAIN

AND THESE FAKE-ASSTIMBERLANDS.

- AAAAAAHHH...- OH, MAN!

- I'M SORRY.NO, YOU'RE OKAY, MAN.

I'M SORRY.I REALLY APOLOGIZE.

- YO, MAN.WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM, MAN?

- HEY, HEY!REMEMBER--NO, NO, HEY!

- AAAAAAHHH...

AHH AHH!- WHY ARE YOU DOING ME?

- AAAAAHH!- WHY WOULD YOU--LISTEN.

- AAAAH!- NO. NO, NO, NO. COME ON.

- AAAAHH!- SHH. SHH. SHH.

- ALL RIGHT,YOU GUYS GOTTA GO, MAN.

- NO, COME ON, MAN.- NO, MAN.

NO, YOU'RE ALL DONE, MAN.YOU GOT TO GO.

THAT'S RIGHT, MAN.YO, WE GOT A CHAMPION STILL.

WE GOT A CHAMPION STILLRIGHT HERE.

- HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENIN'?

YEAH! THAT'S WHAT'S UP.THAT'S YOUR BOY--

- AAAAAAHH...- JUST...GIVE ME THE HAT!

- HEY, MAN--- GIVE IT UP!

[indistinct shouting]

GIMME THAT [bleep] HAT!

[birds chirping]

- [sustained gibberish]

- LISTEN.LISTEN--LISTEN, MAN.

I WANT YOU TO LOOK OUTON THE LAKE, MAN.

I JUST WANT YOU TO LOOK OUTAND IMAGINE A PLACE, MAN,

WHERE YOU CAN DOYOUR THING, MAN.

- HOOOOO...

- WHERE YOU AND I COULD GOAND DO OUR THING,

BUT NEVER HAVE TO FORFEIT, YEAH!- YAHH.

- YOU COULD SCREAM AND SHOUTAND SHOVE PEOPLE

BACK AND FORTH, BUT WE DON'TNEVER HAVE TO QUIT.

- AAAAH!- BUT LOOK OUT ON THE LAKE, MAN.

LOOK OUT ON THE LAKE.

NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, MAN,I START RAPPIN'.

- HWAH!

- AND MY RHYMES,THEY START TO FLOW.

AND I'M TURNIN' THE TIDE.

AND NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO,YOU CAN PUSH AND SHOVE

AND SCREAM, BUT WE'LL NEVERGET DISQUALIFIED.

- LAA LAA LAA!

AH HA HA HA!

YEAH, YEAH, OOH! HA-HA!

- MAN, FOR GOOD MEASURE, WHILEYOU'RE LOOKING AT THE LAKE,

JUST GIVE MEONE MORE GOOD "AAAAHH."

- AAAAH--

[gunshot]

- YOU KNOW WHAT'D BE GREAT,IS IF THERE WERE

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