I was in Edinburgh, Scotland,
for a month last year,doing shows.
It was a fine time.
I said the whitest thingI've ever said in my life
Not anything terrible,but just white.
You know, sometimeshow you're hyper-aware
of, like,"Whoa, that was white."
Like, where youeven have to step back
after something comesout of your mouth,
like, "Ho-ho, mm."
"This tuna salad is pretty good,
but it could use a little bitmore mayonnaise, Barbara."
Thought you were morewell-rounded than that, dude.
Come on, man.
"A karaoke birthday partyon a Monday.
You're crazyfor this one, Timothy."
But then, once in a while,you just top yourself.
That's what happened to mein Edinburgh.
I think the exact phraseI used in Edinburgh, I was like,
"I can't believe this castledoesn't have wi-fi."
That was it.
It's not getting whiterthan that, dude.
You complainedabout brand-new white shit
inside of real old white shit.
You just made a honky turducken,is what you did.