Pretty White Girl Sings Dave's Thoughts - Uncensored

  • Season 1 , Ep 2
  • 01/29/2003
  • Views: 73,624

Dave enlists the help of a singing pretty white girl to say the things he can't get away with on television. (4:15)

Watch Full Episode

I DON'T KNOW IF YOUGUYS HAVE SEEN SOME THINGS

THAT WERE WRITTEN CALLING USCONTROVERSIAL,

WHICH I WAS SURPRISED ABOUT.

THAT'S THE THINGABOUT BEING ON TV,

YOU JUST NEVER CAN SAY WHATYOU WANNA SAY, MAN.

'CAUSE, IF I SAIDEVERYTHING I THOUGHT

IT WOULD JUST FREAKAMERICA OUT.

YOU WOULDN'T WANNAHEAR A YOUNG BLACK DUDE

SAYING HALF THE THINGSI BE THINKING.

THE ONLY WAY PEOPLE WOULDLISTEN TO THE STUFF I THINK

IS IF A PRETTY WHITE GIRLSANG MY THOUGHTS.

AND I ACTUALLY HAPPEN TOHAVE A PRETTY WHITE GIRL HERE.

PRETTY WHITE GIRL,COME ON OUT.

SHE'S IN MY CONTRACT.

( cheering )

GOOD EVENING,PRETTY WHITE WOMAN.

THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE.

I HAVE SOME THINGSI NEED TO GET OFF MY CHEST.

♪ CRACK WAS INVENTEDAND DISTRIBUTED ♪

♪ TO INTENTIONALLYDESTROY THE BLACK COMMUNITY ♪

♪ AIDS WAS TOO ♪

♪ THE POLICE NEVER LOOK FORTUPAC AND BIGGIE'S MURDERERS ♪

♪ FUCK THE POLICE ♪

( applause )

♪ WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO THATRECOUNT IN FLORIDA ♪

♪ O.J DIDN'T DO IT ♪

♪ ON SECOND THOUGHT,YEAH HE DID ♪

♪ GAY SEX IS GROSS ♪

♪ SORRY I JUSTFIND IT TO BE GROSS ♪

♪ UNLESS OF COURSETHEY'RE LESBIANS ♪

♪ I LIKE LESBIANS ♪

♪ I LIKELESBIANS ♪

FOR REAL,I LIKE LESBIANS.

BUT I DIGRESS FROMMY POINT...

♪ ALL CHINESEPEOPLE LOOK ALIKE ♪

♪ SO DO WHITE PEOPLE ♪

♪ PRETTY MUCHANYONE WHO ISN'T BLACK ♪

♪ LOOKS ALIKE TO ME ♪

♪ OH I WANT TO STICKMY THUMB IN J-LO'S BUTT ♪

♪ I WOULDN'T MIND STICKINGA FINGER OR TWO ♪

♪ UP THAT SINGINGWHITE GIRL'S BUTT EITHER ♪

♪ CALL ME ON MY CELL, 917-- ♪

( applause )

♪ AND NOW IT'S TIMETO COLLECT AD REVENUE ♪

♪ FOR COMEDY CENTRAL ♪

( cheering )

♪ REVENUE THEY DON'TSHARE WITH MY BLACK ASS ♪

( cheers & applause )

REAL SEX, STREET INTERVIEWS,TAKE ONE !

Loading...