Charlie Murphy's True Hollywood Stories - Rick James Pt. 1 - Uncensored

  • Season 2 , Ep 4
  • 02/11/2004
  • Views: 1,844,556

Eddie Murphy's brother Charlie tells the tale of Rick James, an habitual line-stepper. (4:38)

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YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

AND HERE HE COMES OUT THE ROOM,WHEN I LOOK AT HIM--

AND I'M NOTBULLSHITTING YOU, MAN,

I SEEN, LIKE,

LIKE AN ORANGE--HIS AURA OR WHATEVER,

I SEEN IT.

IT WAS ORANGE.

- ♪ GIVE IT TO ME, BABY

- ♪ GIVE IT TO ME, BABY

- HE STARTED KICKING IT.

AND HE WASMAD NIGGERISH, MAN,

WHICH WAS, YOU KNOW,RIGHT UP MY ALLEY.

- I'M ONE OF THE BADDESTMOTHERFUCKERS OF ALL TIME.

I'M ONE OFTHE BEST SINGERS

AND ONE OF THE BEST-LOOKIN'MOTHERFUCKERS YOU'VE EVER SEEN.

HOLD MY DRINK, BITCH.

- HE'D WALK UP TO ANY CHICK

AND LICK THE WHOLE SIDEOF THEIR FACE, MAN.

- I'M RICK JAMES, BITCH.

ENJOY YOURSELF.

[chuckling]

- WE GOT CLOSER,STARTED HANGING OUT.

MY BROTHER DIDN'T DOANY OF THIS SHIT.

SO AT NIGHT,WHEN EDDIE WOULD BREAK OUT,

WE WOULD ALL BEGETTING CRAZY AND WILD.

AND IF I WAS HANGINGWITH RICK,

HE HAD THIS THING WITH ME

WHERE HE USED TO ALWAYS,LIKE, FUCK WITH ME, MAN.

I DON'T KNOWWHAT STARTED IT.

- CHARLIE, HE WAS HANGING OUTWITH THE BIG DOGS, YOU KNOW?

CHARLIE, HE DIDN'T KNOWHE WAS DOING CRAZY THINGS

AND I HADTO STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT.

SOMETIMES I HAD TO GOUPSIDE HIS HEAD.

- THINGS ESCALATEDTO THE POINT WHERE, YOU KNOW,

MY MAN GOT TOO FAMILIAR

AND I ENDED UP HAVINGTO WHIP HIS ASS, MAN,

YOU KNOW, BECAUSE,

YOU KNOW, HE WOULDSTEP ACROSS THE LINE.

HABITUALLY.HE'S A HABITUAL LINE-STEPPER.

THE FIRST TIME, YOU KNOW,

I HAD TO END UPWHIPPING HIS ASS, UH...

WE WENT TO STUDIO 54.

WE WALKIN' UPINTO THE VIP SECTION AND, UM,

I'M LOOKING AROUNDTO SEE WHO'S THERE

AND LOOKIN' AT THE GIRLSAND EVERYTHING.

AND ALL OF A SUDDENI HEARD SOMEONE GO...

- CHARLIE MURPHY!

THAT WAS...♪ COLD-BLOODED

[laughs]

- HE HAD THIS RING ON

TO COMMEMORATE THIS SONGHE HAD PUT OUT CALLED UNITY.

- AND THIS WAS IMPRINTEDIN THAT BLACK HEAD OF HIS

FOR AT LEAST A WEEK.

- ♪ UNITY

- EDDIE AND EVERYBODY ELSE

THOUGHT THAT THAT WASTHE FUNNIEST SHIT.

AND SO THAT THREW ME INA WEIRD SPACE,

'CAUSE I'M LIKE,YEAH, THIS IS RICK JAMES.

HE'S A STAR.

- I'M RICK JAMES, BITCH.[laughs]

THIS IS A CELEBRATION, BITCH.[laughs]

- MAYBE I'M OVERREACTING.

I ACTUALLY WENT THERE, LIKE,

"MAYBE I SHOULDN'T DO NOTHING,"

BUT MY GHETTO SIDE WAS GOIN',

"YO, STOMP THIS MOTHERFUCKEROUT RIGHT HERE.

WHAT THE FUCKIS WRONG WITH HIM?"

- I DRUNK SOME WINE

AND I'M JUST GETTINGSTARTED, BITCHES.

[laughing]

- HE TOTALLYJUST WROTE ME OFF.

LIKE, I'M THAT NIGGATO STEAL ON,

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

- WHAT, HE'S GONNA SLAP ME BACK?

I'M RICK JAMES.HE'S CHARLIE MURPHY.

- I WAITED, 'CAUSE I KNEWWHAT HOTEL HE WAS STAYIN' IN.

EDDIE AND THEM WENT HOME

AND I SAID,"YO, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK."

I SHOT OVER TO THE HOTEL,WENT UP TO HIS ROOM,

KNOCKED ON THE DOOR.

- SO THEN HE COMES IN THERE.

AND I SAID, "LOOK, BITCH,I'M RICK JAMES."

SMACKED HIM.[chuckling]

OH, CHARLIE MURPHY!

HE HAD HIS HEAD COCKEDTO THROW ANOTHER RIGHT HAND.

WHEN HE WAS COMING FOR IT,I JUST CAME--BLAOW!

I CAUGHT HIMWITH THE FRONT.

- HE'LL TELL ITLIKE HE GAVE ME

SOME KIND OF BRUCE LEECROSSKICK OR SOMETHIN'.

- I KICKED THE SHITOUT OF HIM, MAN.

- [screams]

[screams in slow motion]

- THE WIND ISKNOCKED OUT OF HIM.

AND THEN HE SCREAMS OUT...

- SECURITY!

- THE ONE IN THE FRONT,HE HAD CROOKED EYES AND SHIT.

HIS ONE EYE WAS LOOKIN' AT ME.

THE OTHER ONEWAS LOOKING AT RICK.

RICK HAD EDGED OVERBY THE WINDOW.

- NOW, DARKNESS,THE TABLES ARE TURNED.

DO WITH HIM WHATEVER YOU LIKE.

- YOU MOTHERFUCKERSTAKE ONE MORE STEP,

I'M KICKIN' THIS NIGGA OUTTHE MOTHERFUCKIN' WINDOW.

- BOBBY, FREEZE!

- YOU KNOW YOU WAS WRONGFOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME EARLIER.

LOOK WHAT YOU DIDTO MY FACE.

- I'M SORRY, CHARLIE MURPHY.IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

I WAS HAVING TOO MUCH FUN.

I'LL OFFER YOU A TRUCE.

THE STICKIEST OF THE ICKY.

YOU WANT TO SMOKEWITH THE OLD BOY, RICK JAMES?

- YO, MAN, MY FOREHEADIS BUMPIN', MAN.

- NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT,

I THINK I'M BLEEDINGINSIDE MY CHEST.

BUT I GOT THE MEDICINE.

BITCH, COME OVER HERE

AND HAVE SEXWITH CHARLIE MURPHY.

I'M RICK JAMES, BITCH.

- THAT WAS HOWTHAT PARTICULAR INCIDENT ENDED,

BUT IT WASN'T THE LAST TIMEI HAD TO WHIP HIS ASS...

WHIP HIS ASS...WHIP HIS ASS.

- DON'T YOU THINKCHARLIE'S A LITTLE OLD

TO BE TAKING KARATE?

HE PROBABLY TAKIN' ITWITH THE LITTLE KIDS.

YEAH, CHARLIE WHIPPED MY ASSIN HIS DREAMS.

I TOLD YOU, CHARLIE HAD

DELUSIONS OF GRANDEURIN HIS HEAD.

I'M TELLING YOUWHAT WAS HAPPENING.

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