we're joined now
by senior political analystHasan Minhaj, everybody.
Hasan, how are you fearing...feeling right now?
Trevor, like many Americans,I have spent the last 12 hours
refreshing the Canadianimmigration Web site,
which keeps crashing.
So, I am panicking,
because melanin doesn't rub off.
But look, Donald Trump won.
We got to take the L.
He spoke to people who feltignored by Washington
and wanted their jobs back.And I understand.
I don't quite get how you getthere by electing a guy
who collept...collects bankruptcies
the way Michael Jordancollects rings,
but okay,they deserve to be heard.
And last night we heard them.
But I can't forgetsomething else I heard.
On December 7, 2015,Donald Trump
called for a totaland complete shutdown
of Muslimsentering the United States.
I remember that datebecause it's the birthday
of the worst (bleep)day of my life!
Seriously, how is that notinstantly disqualifying?
Even if that's not why mostpeople voted for him,
open racism shouldjust be a deal breaker.
You personally may not be aracist, sexist, xenophobe,
but that comes with the package.Right?
Like, if a carcomes with heated seats,
you may not want them,but you'll take them.
Yeah, but then if the seats go,
"Hey, don't sit on me,camel jockey."
You should be like,"Hey! I don't want the car."
So if you take that deal,
what you're telling me is,"Hey, man, I don't hate you.
I just don't care about you."
I hear you, Hasan, I hear you.
Uh, but Islamophobiain America is nothing new.
You've encountered thismany, many times since 9/11.
Have I pretended to be PuertoRican a few times since 9/11?
Claro que si.
it used to be,when I walked on a plane,
I could feel the staresand suspicion.
And it sucked.
But at least I knew thepresident of the United States
had my back.
Mostly becausehe's also a Muslim.
We can say it now.It doesn't matter!
It doesn't matter!He's Muslim, okay?
Okay? Who gives a (bleep)?
But now that assholein seat 21B,
calling the flight attendant,trying to get me thrown off
the plane, now that guyis the president.
Plus, I also think he's gropingthe lady sitting next to him.
And, look, I don't want peoplethinking, like, "Aw.
"Aw, that poor little Muslimboy, that little brown boy,
your life is tough."No, it's all of us.
It's not just Muslims orMexicans or African-Americans--
it is all of us,whether it's your citizenship,
marriage rights,freedom of speech,
Donald Trump is gonna moveon them like a bitch.
That was his line.You just quoted his line.
-Yeah.-That's what he said.
Y-You know though that thereis... there is a chance--
and I know it's weirdto say this--
there is a chance that maybe
he'll end upbeing more moderate.
Oh, diet xenophobia.That's cool.
Low-calorie racism. Mmm.Like, what?
This is a true story.
My mom is out of the countryright now.
She's visiting my grandma.
And she's a U.S. citizen.She's lived here 30 years.
She's on the phone with melast night,
and she's like, "Hasan,I don't know if I can come back
Am I gonna be able to get backinto the country?"
And the factthat I can't tell her yes
with 100% certaintyis heartbreaking.
And there are a lot of peopletelling me, "Hey, man,
don't worry. Trump's notreally gonna ban all Muslims."
But I don't know, man.That is my mom.
And I need her back home,because I love her
and she owes me $300.
Thank you, Hasan.