Masturbating Sniper

  • Season 1 , Ep 5
  • 11/09/2010
  • Views: 108,403

"Masturbating Sniper" takes down another scumbag with a clean brainstem shot from 200 meters. (2:14)

- TAKE IT.- THERE'S NO SHOT.

IT'S TOO FAR.WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO GOINSIDE THE BUILDING.

NEGATIVE.WE'RE NOT GONNA JEOPARDIZETHAT MANY LIVES.

WE'VE GOTTATAKE IT FROM HERE.WE NEED THIS SHOT.

( rock music playing )

OH, THANK GOD.THE SNIPER'S HERE.MAKE ROOM!

FOURTH FLOOR,CORNER WINDOW.

YEAH, THE TERRORISTIS EXPOSING 8.6cmOF HIS SHOULDER.

DO YOU HAVE ANY METAL-EAZESUPER SPEED BULLETS?

- THIS GUY'S AMAZING.- HE'S THE BEST.

- ( zipper zings )- ( gun cocks )

WHAT THE HELL?

THE TERRORIST ISGONNA BE TERMINATED.

SCUMBAG. ( gasps )

SOUL LEAVING THE BODY.SOUL LEAVING THE BODY!

OH! SOUL LEAVINGTHE BODY!

- ( gunshot )- AH!

- OH! GREAT SHOT!- Man: WHOO!

CAPTAIN, DID YOU SEE THAT?THAT'S DISGUSTING.

WHAT? A CLEANBRAINSTEM SHOTFROM 200 METERS?

THAT'S HEROIC, SON.

- WE JUST TOOK DOWN ANOTHER SCUMBAG.- ( gags )

PACK IT UP, BOYS.WE'VE GOT SOME WORK TO DO.

GIVE HIM SOME SPACE.DON'T LOOK HIM IN THE EYE.

- MOVE!- DON'T LOOK ME IN MY EYE.

Man #2: YOU DID A GOOD THING.

GOD WIRED MEA LITTLE DIFFERENT, HUH?

YOU DIDA GOOD THING.

( crying )

Announcer: NEXT TIME ON "MASTURBATING SNIPER"...

GUESS WHAT I JUST WATCHED.THE SECURITY CAMERA FOOTAGE

FROM THE BANK ROBBERYLAST WEEK.

YOU'RE OUT OF CONTROL.

THE CHIEF WANTS TO PUT YOU BEHIND A DESK.

Sniper's voice: KILLING BAD GUYS IS

THE ONLY WAY I CAN... EJACULATE.

ARE YOU COMING TO BED?

NO.

( gunfire )

REALLY? AGAIN?

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