The Colbert Report
Sign Off - Captain America Shield
Season 3 • 03/12/2007
Stephen Colbert has been left the shield of Captain America following the hero's death.
Intro - 3/8/07The Colbert ReportS3
Stephen wants the judge in the Scooter Libby trial to apologize, and he can't wait to see Ted Koppel in the tank for shark week.
Ted KoppelThe Colbert ReportS3
Ted Koppel suggests that Stephen reconsider prancing around in front of the audience.
The Word - Comic JusticeThe Colbert ReportS3
There are times when Captain America has gone against the government in order to do what he feels is right, and this time it got him killed.
Better Know a District - Kentucky's 3rd - John YarmuthThe Colbert ReportS3
Representative John Yarmuth knows how to dispose of kittens if you don't have a shovel or a garbage can.
Jesus LibbyThe Colbert ReportS3
The similarities between Jesus and Scooter Libby are startling.
Tip/Wag - U.S. MintThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen wags his finger at the U.S. Mint and high school seniors and tips his hat to Duke University graduate John Cornwell.
The Word - Home Field AdvantageThe Colbert ReportS3
Stephen encourages countries like Congo and Sierra Leone to give America money first, so that we can one day help them solve their own problems.
Intro - 3/12/07The Colbert ReportS3
Bill Gates worries about American competitiveness, high school students get an F in religion and Stephen interviews New York Times columnist Nicholas Kristof.
Newt Gingrich's Extramarital AffairThe Colbert ReportS3
Newt Gingrich had the courage to lead the impeachment of Bill Clinton for his affair with Monica Lewinsky while having an affair of his own.
Nicholas KristofThe Colbert ReportS3
The New York Times columnist Nicolas Kristof complains that Americans aren't charitable enough, even though Stephen let him on his show.
Sign Off - Captain America ShieldThe Colbert ReportS3
Marvel Comics' Joe Quesada has bequeathed the shield of Captain America to the only man who has the red, white and blue balls to carry the mantle: Stephen Colbert.
Michael Eric DysonThe Colbert ReportS3
Michael Eric Dyson explains the difference between racism and bigotry and assures Stephen that he's probably got a few black relatives.
Willie Nelson's CobblerThe Colbert ReportS3
Upon discovering that Ben and Jerry's also named an ice cream after Willie Nelson, Stephen launches a campaign to expose Nelson for who he really is.
Four Horsemen of the A-Pop-Calypse - 300The Colbert ReportS3
Pop culture is a threat to our youth, with the exception of the film "300".
Time TravelThe Colbert ReportS3
Scientists claim that time travel is impossible; Stephen proves them wrong by traveling forward in time.
The Word - GoodnightThe Colbert ReportS3
Tonight's Word is about the only thing Stephen has time for.
Donald ShieldsThe Colbert ReportS3
Dr. Donald Shields talks about the firing of eight U.S. attorneys. According to Stephen, they should have pleasured the president.
Intro - 3/13/07The Colbert ReportS3
The firing of eight U.S. attorneys, America's biggest movie and guest Michael Eric Dyson -- tonight on The Report.
Sport Report - NCAAThe Colbert ReportS3
Speaking of non-drug-related euphoria, Stephen is simply mentally unbalanced about March Madness.
Sign Off - United We LickThe Colbert ReportS3
Although Stephen can't enjoy his ice cream until Lent ends, his famous friends can.
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