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The Colbert Report
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The Colbert Report
Sign Off - Goodnight
Season 5 • 11/17/2009
Stephen says goodnight.
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Watching
03:32
The Colbert Report
S5
Alpha Dog of the Week - Joe Perry
Joe Perry has always been the face of Aerosmith -- you just might not know it because his hair is often in the way.
11/16/2009
00:31
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 11/16/09
Aerosmith breaks up to pursue separate nursing homes, and Paul Goldberger discusses Stephen's favorite architect, Mike Brady.
11/16/2009
05:49
The Colbert Report
S5
The Word - Skeletons in the Closet
How is the governor of Rhode Island supposed to rest in peace knowing that a couple of plots over two dudes are being gay dead?
11/16/2009
00:19
The Colbert Report
S5
Sign Off - Good Morning, Burma
Stephen says good morning to anybody watching from Burma, and congratulations on owning a TV.
11/16/2009
03:07
The Colbert Report
S5
Obama Bows to Japanese Emperor
President Obama brings great shame upon America by taking a deep bow to the emperor of Japan.
11/16/2009
06:30
The Colbert Report
S5
Paul Goldberger
Paul Goldberger says buildings bring out our emotions and are part of our most profound memories.
11/16/2009
07:09
The Colbert Report
S5
Kid Gloves - Marc Kielburger
Marc Kielburger attempts to break the cycle of poverty by taking kids out of child labor and putting them in school.
11/17/2009
06:21
The Colbert Report
S5
Better Know a District - California's 12th - Jackie Speier
Representative Jackie Speier defends gay rights and shoots a viral skateboarding video for YouTube with Stephen.
11/17/2009
00:33
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 11/17/09
Congress cracks down on child labor, Stephen profiles California's 12th district, and Malcolm Gladwell talks about his new book.
11/17/2009
05:45
The Colbert Report
S5
Malcolm Gladwell
Malcolm Gladwell tries to get people to see connections between their own worlds and worlds outside of theirs.
11/17/2009
00:02
The Colbert Report
S5
Sign Off - Goodnight
That's it for The Report, everybody.
11/17/2009
04:30
The Colbert Report
S5
The Word - Grand Old Pity Party
Fact checking and opposition research are the same thing to Sarah Palin because she knows the facts are out to get her.
11/18/2009
02:09
The Colbert Report
S5
Eggo Waffles Shortage Alert
Stephen puts America on Waff-Con Four and calls on President Obama to open the strategic waffle reserves.
11/18/2009
04:37
The Colbert Report
S5
ThreatDown - Quetzalcoatl, Santa Claus & Canadian Groin Kickers
Stephen refuses to apologize to Quetzalcoatl, Santa Claus could make you sick, and a Canadian woman kicks strangers in the balls.
11/18/2009
03:29
The Colbert Report
S5
Norah Jones
Norah Jones doesn't like her fans enough to get caught snorting coke in her underwear.
11/18/2009
00:35
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 11/18/09
Sarah Palin has a 400-page book, "2012" takes the world by storm, and Norah Jones talks about her famous father, Indiana.
11/18/2009
00:17
The Colbert Report
S5
Sign Off - Thanks, Elvis Costello
Elvis Costello will come back and do a song with Stephen when he gets his voice back.
11/19/2009
05:33
The Colbert Report
S5
Tip/Wag - U.S. Speedskating Team, NY Lottery & William Phillips
The U.S. Speedskating team wins at the World Cup, the New York Lottery goes upscale, and a fifth grader refuses to recite the Pledge of Allegiance.
11/19/2009
02:03
The Colbert Report
S5
Stephen Shakes His Moneymaker
Stephen liquidates his investments and injects them into his ass after the Senate introduces a tax on plastic surgery.
11/19/2009
05:26
The Colbert Report
S5
Celebrating the AK-47 - John Pike
John Pike talks about the popularity of the AK-47 as the Russian designer celebrates his 90th birthday.
11/19/2009
00:36
The Colbert Report
S5
Intro - 11/30/09
Copenhagen hosts an environmental summit, Stephen talks to an advocate for nuclear disarmament, and Cevin Soling says schools have turned into prisons.
11/30/2009
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South Park
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A Front Row Seat to South Park The 25th Anniversary Concert
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