The Colbert Report

Mitt Happens

Season 7 • 04/12/2011

Mitt Romney delivers a message that every American can relate to: "Sometimes I suck."

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00:06

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Champagne Flute of Lead Paint

Stephen signs off with a champagne flute of lead paint.
04/11/2011
03:36

The Colbert ReportS7
Countdown to Government Shutdown

Stephen prepares for the government shutdown with a champagne flute of lead paint and gets up early to listen to the government closings.
04/11/2011
04:39

The Colbert ReportS7
Thought for Food - Chocolate Air, Denny's & Bacon Cologne

Candy makers put air in their chocolate bars, Denny's celebrates fried pork, and a new fragrance combines essential oils with the essence of bacon.
04/11/2011
06:35

The Colbert ReportS7
Jamie Hyneman & Adam Savage

Stephen wants Jamie Hyneman and Adam Savage to bust the myths of evolution and throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
04/11/2011
00:05

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Goodnight

That's it for The Report.
04/12/2011
02:48

The Colbert ReportS7
Threat Level: Rainbow

The Family Leader's Bob Vander Plaats believes same-sex marriage is just as dangerous as second-hand smoke.
04/12/2011
03:31

The Colbert ReportS7
Mitt Happens - Rick Brookhiser

Rick Brookhiser says Mitt Romney won't win the Republican nomination because he looks like the secret grandfather of Obamacare.
04/12/2011
00:35

The Colbert ReportS7
Intro - 4/12/11

Mitt Romney throws his hat in the presidential ring, and Ray Kurzweil believes man and machine are becoming one.
04/12/2011
03:43

The Colbert ReportS7
Jon Kyl Tweets Not Intended to Be Factual Statements

Stephen celebrates Jon Kyl's groundbreaking excuse-planation by tweeting round-the-clock non-facts about him.
04/12/2011
05:39

The Colbert ReportS7
Ray Kurzweil

Ray Kurzweil predicts that people will merge with technology and become a billion times smarter by 2045.
04/12/2011
04:00

The Colbert ReportS7
Mitt Happens

Mitt Romney competes with Mike Huckabee, Donald Trump and a long list of dark horses for the Republican nomination.
04/12/2011
03:00

The Colbert ReportS7
Tim Pawlenty Declares Candidacy Before He's Ready

Tim Pawlenty tries to reclaim his non-candidacy, but no one's going to want Piers Morgan's sloppy seconds.
04/13/2011
06:07

The Colbert ReportS7
Morgan Spurlock

Morgan Spurlock pulls the curtain back on product placement and advertising in "The Greatest Movie Ever Sold."
04/13/2011
00:06

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - Doritos Suit

Stephen wears a Doritos suit and enjoys Americone Dream.
04/13/2011
05:03

The Colbert ReportS7
The Enemy Within - Unicyclists

Riding unicycles used to be a shameful pastime for circus animals and secretaries of defense, but this one-wheel lifestyle is seeping into the mainstream.
04/13/2011
06:05

The Colbert ReportS7
The Word - Buy and Cellulite

Unilever creates armpit insecurity among women so it can make money selling the solution.
04/13/2011
04:51

The Colbert ReportS7
Colbert Super PAC - Trevor Potter

Jay the Intern's pony is rested, watered and ready to take Stephen's super PAC forms to Washington, D.C.
04/14/2011
00:08

The Colbert ReportS7
Sign Off - iPad

Stephen signs off with his iPad.
04/14/2011
03:22

The Colbert ReportS7
Viacom Ruins Stephen's PAC Dream

Stephen says goodbye to his dream of starting a Colbert PAC after receiving a letter from Viacom.
04/14/2011
03:01

The Colbert ReportS7
Easter Under Attack - Egg Edition

A government-sponsored egg hunt in Ohio takes out the word "Easter," and the White House offers environmentally friendly eggs.
04/14/2011
06:47

The Colbert ReportS7
Caroline Kennedy

Caroline Kennedy and Stephen read poetry by W.H. Auden and Edna St. Vincent Millay.
04/14/2011
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