The Colbert Report

Microbe Beat!

Season 4 • 05/28/2008

Penicillin is a godless healing machine.

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04:21

Bears & Balls - Dollar Stores
The Colbert ReportS4

If you shop for groceries at dollar stores, you can find bargains on discontinued lunch meats and irregular bacon.
05/15/2008
02:59

McCain's Preachers
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen is fine with Reverend Hagee calling the Catholic Church the apostate church because he doesn't know what that word means.
05/27/2008
00:31

Intro - 5/27/08
The Colbert ReportS4

John McCain rejects the support of two controversial pastors, which gives Stephen an excuse to show more Reverend Wright footage.
05/27/2008
04:56

Brian Greene
The Colbert ReportS4

Brian Greene explains to Stephen what the big deal is about science.
05/27/2008
00:55

Fleet Week
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen explains the proper way to show your excitement when you're greeting a member of the armed services.
05/27/2008
06:03

Tony Perkins
The Colbert ReportS4

Tony Perkins and Stephen discuss their outrage over the California Supreme Court ruling to legalize gay marriage.
05/27/2008
04:05

The Word - Brushback Pitch
The Colbert ReportS4

Little Leaguers aren't just stealing team names from Major League Baseball. Where did they get the idea of using a mitt or wearing a cup?
05/28/2008
00:34

Intro - 5/28/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Little League Baseball players are under attack, something is in our water, and Senator Claire McCaskill will never inspire young women because she supports Barack Obama.
05/28/2008
06:32

Claire McCaskill
The Colbert ReportS4

Senator Claire McCaskill explains why Barack Obama is the best man or woman to be the next president of the United States.
05/28/2008
05:36

Cheating Death - Liquid Launch
The Colbert ReportS4

Liquid Launch is a new energy drink that doesn't have one of the ingredients in rocket fuel -- it has every ingredient in rocket fuel.
05/28/2008
02:48

Microbe Beat!
The Colbert ReportS4

The number one threat to microbes is penicillin -- a godless healing machine.
05/28/2008
04:05

Tad Devine
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen asks Tad Devine if we can add a third candidate to the Democratic race, like a rabid monkey or an underfed tiger.
05/29/2008
04:10

Tip/Wag - Monetary Discrimination
The Colbert ReportS4

Money should have different smells so blind people can tell the bills apart.
05/29/2008
00:17

Sneak Preview
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen gives a sneak preview of Monday night's show.
05/29/2008
02:14

Shout Out! - Broken Space Toilet
The Colbert ReportS4

The astronauts are not pooping in a bag -- they're pooping in a bag-like collection system.
05/29/2008
00:34

Intro - 5/29/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Scott McClellan's new book accuses Bush of lying to get us into Iraq. That took balls, Scott -- five years ago.
05/29/2008
03:05

Democralypse Now - Florida and Michigan
The Colbert ReportS4

To deny the votes of Michigan and Florida is to say that Kurt Cobain died in vain.
05/29/2008
05:26

David Sirota
The Colbert ReportS4

David Sirota explains the presidential campaign isn't the only place where change happens.
05/29/2008
01:01

Final Thought
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen gives America the final thought on what should have been done with Michigan and Florida.
06/02/2008
05:22

Jon Paskowitz
The Colbert ReportS4

Jon Paskowitz tells Stephen what it was like to travel around with a large family and a father who decided his children were going to surf instead of go to school.
06/02/2008
04:13

The Word - Media Culpa
The Colbert ReportS4

Media, if you want to prove you did your job well in the lead-up to the Iraq war, use the same techniques that McClellan used to sell the war to you in the first place.
06/02/2008
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