The Colbert Report

Intro - 10/13/09

Season 5 • 10/13/2009

Should religion be allowed in national parks? It would be great to get baptized in Old Faithful.

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05:59

Fallback Position - James Blake
The Colbert ReportS5

James Blake overcomes Stephen's total lack of athletic ability to transform him into a tennis champion.
10/12/2009
07:17

War of Peace - Shashi Tharoor
The Colbert ReportS5

Shashi Tharoor believes President Obama deserves the Nobel Peace Prize for giving hope to people around the world.
10/12/2009
00:18

Sign Off - Thanks to the Guests
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen thanks Shashi Tharoor, James Blake and Sanjay Gupta for being his guests.
10/12/2009
00:32

Intro - 10/12/09
The Colbert ReportS5

The world has a peace prize in its pocket for Barack Obama, Dr. Sanjay Gupta keeps Larry King "live," and Stephen looks for a backup job.
10/12/2009
05:36

Sanjay Gupta
The Colbert ReportS5

Sanjay Gupta wants to intervene in the process of death and possibly reverse it.
10/12/2009
05:47

Sylvia Earle
The Colbert ReportS5

Sylvia Earle stresses the importance of doing everything we can to protect the ocean and restore health to the system that takes care of us.
10/13/2009
00:11

Sign Off - Gmail
The Colbert ReportS5

If you're watching on a computer, open up Gmail so Stephen can check some messages.
10/13/2009
04:47

The Word - Symbol-Minded
The Colbert ReportS5

The cross has nothing to do with Christianity -- it's just the normal symbol of the resting place of the dead. Download The Word NOW!
10/13/2009
04:19

The Born Supremacy - David Javerbaum
The Colbert ReportS5

One of the most interesting things David Javerbaum discovered while researching his book is that pregnancy often affects the mother.
10/13/2009
03:08

Jermaine Maine Tweets Miley Cyrus Facts
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen's pop star alter ego, Jermaine Maine, posts Twitter updates about Miley Cyrus' life.
10/13/2009
00:32

Intro - 10/13/09
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen tells babies to get a job, and Sylvia Earle prevents him from deep-frying a merman.
10/13/2009
00:09

Sign Off - Should Have Put a Ring On It
The Colbert ReportS5

If you liked tonight's show, then you should have put a ring on it.
10/14/2009
04:24

Yahweh or No Way - Legislation Prayers & Fake Shroud of Turin
The Colbert ReportS5

Special interest groups pray on issues like health care, and an Italian scientist makes a fake Shroud of Turin look like Cher with a mustache.
10/14/2009
04:50

The RZA
The Colbert ReportS5

The RZA wants everyone to know that the truth shall set you free from all things.
10/14/2009
02:23

Pat Roberts Warns Against Health Care Box Canyon
The Colbert ReportS5

Pat Roberts is concerned that health care reform is full of spending quicksand, cactus tax hikes and policy briar patches.
10/14/2009
07:39

The Obesity Epidemic - Amy Farrell
The Colbert ReportS5

Amy Farrell believes the American government is misguided when it focuses on the obesity epidemic.
10/14/2009
01:22

Sign Off - Stephen Unveils a New Portrait
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen unveils his brand new portrait on the four-year anniversary of The Colbert Report's first episode.
10/15/2009
05:09

Tip/Wag - Coal Lobbyists, George Takei & Crispycones
The Colbert ReportS5

A coal lobby represents non-existent Americans, George Takei threatens the sanctity of game shows, and Crispycones are too easy to eat.
10/15/2009
03:29

The Mayo-lution Will Not Be Televised
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen responds to Miracle Whip's advertising campaign with his own extreme ad for mayo.
10/15/2009
06:53

Jerry Mitchell
The Colbert ReportS5

Thanks to Jerry Mitchell's investigations, four people have gone to jail for crimes they committed in the civil rights era.
10/15/2009
00:34

Intro - 10/15/09
The Colbert ReportS5

The Dow hits 10,000, Stephen taps into the youth culture, and Jerry Mitchell investigates unsolved crimes from the civil rights era.
10/15/2009
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