The Colbert Report

Tip/Wag - Gay Building Marriage & Transportation Safety Board Cell Phone Ban

Season 8 • 02/14/2012

A woman marries a female building, and safety experts call for a ban on cell phone use in cars.

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04:43

Stephen Colbert's Free Americone Dream Day
The Colbert ReportS8

Stephen encourages members of Colbert Nation and their lovers to stop by Ben & Jerry's on February 14, 2012, for a free scoop of Americone Dream.
02/13/2012
00:38

Intro - 2/13/12
The Colbert ReportS8

The government cracks down on woodworking, Jimmy Fallon's ice cream war with Stephen heats up, and Bill McKibben discusses global warming.
02/13/2012
04:56

People Who Are Destroying America - SawStop
The Colbert ReportS8

Finger hugger Steve Gass wants big government to force saw manufacturers to adopt his safety technology.
02/13/2012
04:43

Bill McKibben
The Colbert ReportS8

Activist Bill McKibben talks about the proposed Keystone XL oil pipeline and calls on Colbert Nation to sign his petition opposing its construction.
02/13/2012
04:53

Linsanity!
The Colbert ReportS8

You know things are rough when a Harvard economics grad like Jeremy Lin has an easier time getting a job as an NBA point guard than as a Wall Street bond trader.
02/13/2012
00:32

Intro - 2/14/12
The Colbert ReportS8

A health care mandate forces Catholic groups to provide birth control, government may ban cell phone use in cars, and William Broad studies the science of yoga.
02/14/2012
00:09

Sign Off - Stephen's Friend Lou-Dog
The Colbert ReportS8

Stephen howls goodnight with his friend Lou.
02/14/2012
06:54

Contraception Crusade
The Colbert ReportS8

Barack Obama launches a vengeful health care crusade against the Catholic church, essentially forcing priests to hand out condoms at mass.
02/14/2012
05:41

William Broad
The Colbert ReportS8

The New York Times' William Broad explores the sexual benefits of yoga as well as its potential health risks.
02/14/2012
03:11

Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show 2012
The Colbert ReportS8

Although surely wonderful in their own way, members of the shelter dog underclass are just not Kennel Club material.
02/14/2012
04:26

Tip/Wag - Gay Building Marriage & Transportation Safety Board Cell Phone Ban
The Colbert ReportS8

A Seattle woman saves a building by marrying it, and the National Transportation Safety Board rejects Americans' constitutional right to tear down the highway while texting.
02/14/2012
05:51

Ann Patchett
The Colbert ReportS8

Novelist Ann Patchett discusses the importance of brick-and-mortar bookstores and explains what prompted her to open Parnassus Books in Nashville.
02/20/2012
00:06

Sign Off - Caught Looking
The Colbert ReportS8

Stephen admires his eyes in the mirror and says goodnight.
02/20/2012
04:42

Rick Santorum's Energy War Alarm
The Colbert ReportS8

Rick Santorum calls on humans to husband the earth's resources before fracking her good all night long.
02/20/2012
03:12

Intro - 2/20/12
The Colbert ReportS8

Stephen quells wild Internet rumors about his time off and puts Joan Rivers' outrageous speculation to rest.
02/20/2012
06:53

Mitt Romney & Donald Trump in Michigan
The Colbert ReportS8

Mitt Romney attempts to connect to Michigan voters and brings out the biggest, tannest, most leathery gun of them all: Donald Trump.
02/20/2012
00:09

Sign Off - Dark Lord of the Sith
The Colbert ReportS8

Stephen transforms himself into a Sith Lord and cackles maniacally.
02/21/2012
00:34

Intro - 2/21/12
The Colbert ReportS8

Congress attacks Colbert Super PAC, a new sport takes America by storm, and Robert Kagan counsels Mitt Romney on international affairs.
02/21/2012
05:24

Robert Kagan
The Colbert ReportS8

Author Robert Kagan talks about advising Mitt Romney on foreign policy and explores America's use of military force in international affairs.
02/21/2012
06:47

Colbert Super PAC - Nancy Pelosi's Ad & Barack Obama's Super PAC
The Colbert ReportS8

Nancy Pelosi smears Stephen in an effort to pass the Disclose Act, and Barack Obama reverses his stand on super PACs as his reelection campaign solicits donations.
02/21/2012
03:56

Douchebag Showdown
The Colbert ReportS8

Prince Creme Brawlee of Monaco makes the mistake of getting in the face of all-American super-douche Adam Hock and pays the price.
02/21/2012
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