The Colbert Report

Intro - 12/8/07

Season 1 • 12/08/2005

Someone gets nailed by Bill O'Reilly; this time there's no way it's sexual harassment

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03:14

The Word - Hell, No!
The Colbert ReportS1

Americans aren't willing to just give Hugo Chavez their hearts and minds, but they'll trade them for oil.
12/07/2005
04:46

Burritos Happy Holidays
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen finds a blatant example of anti-Christmas secularism run amok.
12/07/2005
05:33

ThreatDown - Threats
The Colbert ReportS1

Another terrorist attack is "inevitable" now that the 9/11 Commission has told the terrorists it is.
12/07/2005
05:28

Craig Crawford
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Stephen and Craig Crawford go way back to their youthful days at the alternative congressional paper, the Congressional Fortnightly.
12/07/2005
01:58

The Mallomar
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Stephen responds to an uplifting story in The New York Times about the Mallomar cookie.
12/08/2005
02:02

Papa Bear Nailed Him
The Colbert ReportS1

After witnessing Bill "Papa Bear" O'Reilly nail journalist Joel Stein, Stephen makes an addition to the Nailed Hall of Fame.
12/08/2005
01:33

Nationwide Secret Santa
The Colbert ReportS1

An article about a town-wide Secret Santa program inspires Stephen to up the ante by starting one nationwide.
12/08/2005
07:52

Peggy Noonan
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Peggy Noonan speaks with Stephen about her new book and President Bush's bad luck.
12/08/2005
02:47

The Word - Satisfied?
The Colbert ReportS1

A Native American group sues the government for $100 billion, but settles for a postage stamp.
12/08/2005
03:38

Movies That Are Destroying America - Christmas
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen recommends "Brokeback Mountain" for the family, but takes serious issue with "The Family Stone" and "The Chronicles of Narnia."
12/08/2005
00:33

Intro - 12/8/07
The Colbert ReportS1

Papa Bear nails someone, Christmas movies that Jesus would pan and a visit from Peggy Noonan on this episode of The Colbert Report.
12/08/2005
02:42

The Word - Belly Achin'
The Colbert ReportS1

Ford Motors recently made health insurance cuts, but that's the way it should be -- cars and health insurance have nothing to do with each other.
12/12/2005
05:38

Harry Smith
The Colbert ReportS1

Harry Smith of "The Early Show" shares some his favorite interviews and narrowly avoids getting nailed.
12/12/2005
03:34

The Real Christmas
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen knows what Christmas is really about: fire, bull testicles, shoe-fruit and black elves.
12/12/2005
02:30

The In-Box - Custom Stamps
The Colbert ReportS1

With the variety of Christmas stamps dwindling, Stephen recommends the use of customized photo stamps.
12/12/2005
00:08

Fract - War
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America has never lost nor tied a war.
12/12/2005
04:38

Un-American News - Tootsie
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A Spanish newspaper awards "Tootsie" a completely and totally un-American three-star rating.
12/12/2005
00:30

Intro - 12/12/05
The Colbert ReportS1

The war on Christmas, cuts in health insurance, foreign press and guest Harry Smith on this episode of The Colbert Report.
12/12/2005
05:02

Formidable Opponent - Steroids
The Colbert ReportS1

Stephen and Stephen debate whether a crackdown on performance-enhancing drugs will save the world of sports or just rob it of its superstars.
12/13/2005
00:09

Fract - NBA
The Colbert ReportS1

Not one of the 170 guards who the National Basketball Association employs has ever been accused of torturing a prisoner.
12/13/2005
02:37

The Word - Lombardi
The Colbert ReportS1

George W. Bush has played five great quarters so far. He never quits; he never pulls out.
12/13/2005
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