The Colbert Report

The Word - The Draft

Season 2 • 12/18/2006

College students should do unforgivable things in the name of war protesting.

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01:50

Blood in the Water - Bruce Tinsley's DUI
The Colbert ReportS2

Cartoonist Bruce Tinsley, who draws the comic strip "Mallard Fillmore," was arrested for DUI, and the left-wing media jumped all over it -- in that it was reported.
12/14/2006
03:33

The Word - Clarity
The Colbert ReportS2

The Kimberly Process tracks diamonds from mine to store to make sure that incoming diamonds are conflict free -- until they reach married couples.
12/14/2006
02:29

The American People Are to Blame
The Colbert ReportS2

Tom DeLay says the will of the American people is no longer behind the war in Iraq and Stephen agrees -- the public should be ready to chew what the president has bitten off.
12/14/2006
01:30

Finger Strengthening
The Colbert ReportS2

The Decemberists stole Stephen's Green Screen Challenge, he called them out, and they challenged him to a guitar solo contest -- so he's been practicing.
12/14/2006
01:22

The Jingle-Terns
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen tried to get holiday song artists, the Jingle Dogs on his show but it didn't work out. So, he presents the Jingle-Terns, his caroling inters.
12/18/2006
00:31

Intro - 12/18/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Dick Cheney says goodbye to Donald Rumsfeld, Stephen takes some time to discus art and gets an idea from former head of General Electric Jack Welch.
12/18/2006
06:27

Jack Welch
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen asks Jack Welch how he's making it on a fixed income and has him sign a copy of his book, "Winning," for his father-in-law.
12/18/2006
02:33

Profiles in Balls
The Colbert ReportS2

Dick Cheney had balls, but Nancy Pelosi doesn't -- although, she could.
12/18/2006
01:41

DIY Cold Medicine
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen was sick all weekend and cold medicine wasn't doing the trick, so he reverse-engineered some crank and made some Sudafed which he snorted.
12/18/2006
03:44

Tip/Wag - Art Edition
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen tips his hat to the exhibition "Bodies" and wags his finger at Picasso, Rodin and Nazi gingerbread men.
12/18/2006
03:09

The Word - The Draft
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen feels the draft should be reinstated so that America can go back to the days of Vietnam when they hated protesters more than the war.
12/18/2006
07:07

Deepak Chopra
The Colbert ReportS2

Deepak Chopra talks to Stephen about life after death, maintaining a youthful biology and his book, which costs 24 dollars.
12/19/2006
06:22

Stephen Goes to Harvard
The Colbert ReportS2

The election on his mind, Stephen takes a trip to Harvard University, where he sets the students of the John F. Kennedy School of Government straight.
12/19/2006
02:47

Person of the Year
The Colbert ReportS2

With the power of the Internet in their hands, the Colbert Nation has become Time Magazine's Person of the Year.
12/19/2006
02:56

The Word - Tit for Tat
The Colbert ReportS2

An outraged Stephen speaks out against beauty queen Tara Conner for publicly exhibiting her sexuality, and proposes a change in the pageant scoring system.
12/19/2006
00:31

Intro - 12/19/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Miss USA gets in trouble for drinking, Stephen tries to live in the basement of Harvard and new age guru Deepak Chopra stops by.
12/19/2006
00:23

Face-Off Preview
The Colbert ReportS2

With the upcoming challenge against the Decemberists' guitarist, Chris Funk, Stephen does a little tapping on his electric guitar to hold us over.
12/19/2006
00:59

Intro - 12/20/06
The Colbert ReportS2

Morley Safer gets us revved up for tonight's guitar solo challenge, when The Decemberists and Stephen face off to determine who is the Socrates of Shred.
12/20/2006
05:08

ShredDown - The Judgment
The Colbert ReportS2

The results are in. The judges and audience cast their votes and Henry Kissinger announces the winner.
12/20/2006
03:05

ShredDown
The Colbert ReportS2

Stephen introduces a tough panel of ShredDown dispute judges: Eliot Spitzer, Anthony DeCurtis and Jim Anderson.
12/20/2006
02:12

Chris Funk
The Colbert ReportS2

Henry Kissinger provides the "starting gun" of the competition by declaring that "it is time to rock," and then Chris Funk offers his shredding solo.
12/20/2006
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