The Colbert Report

McCain Guarantees Victory

Season 4 • 10/27/2008

There is no better place for John McCain to guarantee victory than Waterloo.

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05:44

Jonathan Alter
The Colbert ReportS4

Jonathan Alter explains Barack Obama wants to redraw the social contract the way FDR did.
10/23/2008
02:53

The Palins in People Magazine
The Colbert ReportS4

People Magazine does its best retouching work on Sarah Palin since they made Clay Aiken's make-up look like skin.
10/23/2008
05:01

Difference Makers - The National Hummer Club
The Colbert ReportS4

The Hummer is in danger, but one patriotic group is working to save our chariot of freedom.
10/23/2008
05:12

ThreatDown - Who's Nailin' Paylin
The Colbert ReportS4

There's a Sarah Palin look-alike who rides more than snow machines.
10/23/2008
00:03

A Short Goodbye
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen says good night.
10/23/2008
00:30

Intro - 10/23/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Who's threatening our jobs? Wait, people still have jobs?
10/23/2008
05:14

Yo-Yo Ma
The Colbert ReportS4

Yo-Yo Ma talks about his collaboration with friends.
10/27/2008
02:34

Alpha Dog of the Week - Mark Ciptak
The Colbert ReportS4

Mark Ciptak names his newborn baby daughter Sarah McCain Palin behind his wife's back.
10/27/2008
00:40

Intro - 10/27/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Dissent within the Republican Party -- John McCain demands to know the full extent of his relationship with Sarah Palin.
10/27/2008
05:12

The Word - It's Alive!
The Colbert ReportS4

Conservative intellectuals are the hunks of dead flesh sown into the walking corpse of the Republican Party.
10/27/2008
03:57

McCain Guarantees Victory
The Colbert ReportS4

John McCain has Barack Obama right where he wants him -- 10 to 15 points ahead with a huge African-American turnout.
10/27/2008
05:18

Sherman Alexie
The Colbert ReportS4

Sherman Alexie believes John McCain has been great for Native Americans, but he's bad for the country.
10/28/2008
03:47

Ted Stevens Is Found Guilty
The Colbert ReportS4

Throw the book at Ted Stevens -- he has what it takes to be pardoned by President Bush.
10/28/2008
03:39

Canton, Ohio
The Colbert ReportS4

Now that Barack Obama has made Canton, Ohio important to his campaign, Stephen is forced to find it crappy.
10/28/2008
00:10

Tickets to Canada
The Colbert ReportS4

With only six days left until the election, liberals shouldn't forget to buy their tickets to Canada.
10/28/2008
00:33

Intro - 10/28/08
The Colbert ReportS4

Senator Ted Stevens is convicted by a jury of his peers. Wow, they found 12 corrupt senators?
10/28/2008
03:24

Socialist Candidate for President - Brian Moore
The Colbert ReportS4

Brian Moore says Barack Obama is the furthest thing from a socialist candidate.
10/28/2008
03:19

Obama the Socialist
The Colbert ReportS4

Before Barack Obama is sworn in, lick everything you own so it won't get taken.
10/28/2008
00:36

Colbert Completists
The Colbert ReportS4

Tonight's episode is 4140, but the ending line was originally written for episode 4127.
10/29/2008
03:11

John McCain's Big Prank
The Colbert ReportS4

Stephen finally understands why the entire McCain campaign has seemed like a flaming bag of dog poop dropped on America's doorstep.
10/29/2008
03:23

Was It Really That Bad? - The Great Depression
The Colbert ReportS4

Historians admit that, while it was a depression, it was also great.
10/29/2008
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