The Colbert Report

Tek Jansen - From the Future

Season 3 • 02/07/2007

Tek Jansen saves some kids from his future selves.

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00:29

Intro - 2/6/07
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The Pentagon may be doing business with Iran, and Congressman Zack Space can be heard screaming. Plus, Stephen finds out why Charles LeDuff doesn't do Internet dating.
02/06/2007
06:00

Charles LeDuff
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Journalist Charlie LeDuff talks about "US Guys" and tells Stephen that the manliest men in America are in Oklahoma's gay rodeo.
02/06/2007
06:04

Better Know a District - Ohio's 18th - Zack Space
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen takes a look at Ohio's 18th and speaks with Congressman Zack Space, who has some pretty radical views -- for a Democrat.
02/06/2007
03:30

The Word - Making a Killing
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Stephen feels that it's not wrong for the U.S. to sell F-14 fighter jet parts to Iran. They're the only country that uses the jet, so we could make a killing.
02/06/2007
03:52

Pray for Stephen
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen received a form letter informing him that he is one of the most powerful personalities in media and for this reason he has earned himself a day of being prayed for.
02/06/2007
01:19

The San Francisco Treat
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After performing same-sex civil ceremonies in San Francisco, Gavin Newsom had an affair, which basically means that the American family is destroyed.
02/07/2007
06:37

Steven Pinker
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Stephen tells Steven Pinker that he doesn't fear evolution because he doesn't believe in it.
02/07/2007
00:36

Intro - 2/7/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen asks if the Democrats should respond to the Republicans' nonbinding resolution with a nonbinding resolution, and expects to have his mind read by guest Steven Pinker.
02/07/2007
03:47

California Values Watch
The Colbert ReportS3

If Loretta Sanchez's sister Linda is Nicky Hilton, Loretta is Paris.
02/07/2007
02:54

The Word - Silence
The Colbert ReportS3

America's enemies hang on every word that passes through the Senate. That's why it's important for senators to say nothing.
02/07/2007
05:11

Tek Jansen - From the Future
The Colbert ReportS3

Teks from further and further in the future keep showing up to save kids from each other, deliver messages, and have sex (by accident).
02/07/2007
01:50

Stephen for President - A Sign
The Colbert ReportS3

In response to the overwhelming Colbert-for-president forces, Stephen assembles an exploratory committee to determine if he's going to assemble an exploratory committee.
02/08/2007
06:00

Chris Hedges
The Colbert ReportS3

Chris Hedges tells Stephen why the Christian right are America fascists and why his views of Christianity proves that he was home schooled.
02/08/2007
02:48

Was It Really That Bad? - Salem Witch Trials
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen compares the trial of Lewis "Scooter" Libby to the Salem witch trials and shows why it really wasn't that bad.
02/08/2007
02:36

Space Madness
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen defends Lisa Nowak, not so much for confronting her romantic rival, but for wearing a diaper -- plenty of busy professionals, like Bill Gates, wear diapers.
02/08/2007
00:30

Intro - 2/8/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen finds out if America is ready for a black president and if the Scooter Libby trial is actually a witch hunt. Then, Chris Hedges talks about the bad kind of fascism.
02/08/2007
06:38

Debra Dickerson
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen examines whether or not Barack Obama is black with the help of Debra Dickerson.
02/08/2007
05:29

Tip/Wag - John Howard
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Stephen tips the hat from the gays to eleven feet of snow and to John Howard, then wags his finger at a talking urinal cake and John Howard.
02/12/2007
00:31

Intro - 2/12/07
The Colbert ReportS3

The pentagon may get a second chance to manipulate intelligence, identical snowflakes fall in upstate New York, and the forecast is sunny with a chance of nailing.
02/12/2007
06:42

Michael Oppenheimer
The Colbert ReportS3

Dr. Michael Oppenheimer says Stephen can help address the climate crisis with only minor sacrifices. Stephen says he's got the wrong guy.
02/12/2007
01:31

Alpha Dog of the Week - Amitabh Bachchan
The Colbert ReportS3

This week's Alpha Dog is Bollywood film star Amitabh Bachchan, who survived a camel kick to the head due to an indestructible turban.
02/12/2007
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