The Colbert Report

May the Best Stephen Colbert Win

Season 7 • 07/14/2011

Stephen and The Colbert Report get five Emmy nominations.

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00:06

Sign Off - Pen Toss
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen throws and catches a pen.
07/13/2011
06:24

Republicans Choose None of the Above
The Colbert ReportS7

During debt ceiling negotiations with President Obama, the Republicans practice the old saying, “You scratch my back, I get my back scratched.”
07/13/2011
03:17

Flagworth 2012
The Colbert ReportS7

Seeing an American flag can shift voters toward republicanism, so Franklin F. Flagworth should be the GOP's frontrunner.
07/13/2011
05:57

David McCullough
The Colbert ReportS7

David McCullough explains why 19th century Americans moved to Paris rather than stay in the states and appreciate American mayonnaise.
07/13/2011
00:34

Intro - 7/14/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Scandal won't bring down Rupert Murdoch, Gitmo detainees get dangerous, and Jose Antonio Vargas admits to being an illegal immigrant.
07/14/2011
05:33

Murdoch's Media Empire Might Go Down the Toilet
The Colbert ReportS7

With News of the World gone and BSkyB out of reach, all Rupert Murdoch has to comfort him are a few media companies.
07/14/2011
00:07

Sign Off - Goodnight
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen says goodnight and runs around.
07/14/2011
02:52

Carmageddon
The Colbert ReportS7

With the temporary closure of the 405 Freeway in Los Angeles, increased traffic on two off-peak days means someone might have to walk someplace.
07/14/2011
06:18

Jose Antonio Vargas
The Colbert ReportS7

Jose Antonio Vargas explains which is more difficult: coming out of the closet as a gay man or as a border gay.
07/14/2011
03:18

Improvised Expressive Devices
The Colbert ReportS7

Gitmo detainees craft a dangerous new weapon behind bars that may shatter our aesthetic paradigm.
07/14/2011
01:48

May the Best Stephen Colbert Win
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen's Emmy Award nominations might lead to an Emmy three-way.
07/14/2011
02:31

Epic Blockbuster
The Colbert ReportS7

The final "Harry Potter" and Sarah Palin's documentary would make a great double feature because both movies are about outsiders plucked from obscurity by an old wizard.
07/18/2011
00:32

Intro - 7/18/11
The Colbert ReportS7

Everyone continues to talk about the News Corp. phone-hacking scandal, and John Prendergast discusses the two-week-old nation of South Sudan.
07/18/2011
00:31

Sign Off - Prerecorded Episodes
The Colbert ReportS7

Stephen can't be sure what day it is because he prerecorded all these episodes in a 96-hour meth-fueled news binge.
07/18/2011
03:36

Blood in the Water - Rupert Murdoch's News of the World Scandal
The Colbert ReportS7

For some reason, the media continues to talk about the Rupert Murdoch piffle, so Steve Doocy blows the lid back onto the story.
07/18/2011
01:19

Colbert Super PAC - Cash Crawl
The Colbert ReportS7

To seduce the prudent, Stephen puts the names of people who have donated to Colbert Super PAC on a cash crawl.
07/18/2011
07:17

Colbert Super PAC - Campaign Finance
The Colbert ReportS7

Sean Parnell supports Colbert Super PAC's plan to buy an elephant, but Sheila Krumholz wants to shine a light on the taint of private money.
07/18/2011
04:59

John Prendergast
The Colbert ReportS7

John Prendergast talks about the birth of South Sudan, the creation of its flag and the oil curse that might plague its future.
07/18/2011
05:38

God Calls Rick Perry
The Colbert ReportS7

With the tough challenges facing America, Rick Perry thinks it's time to hand it over to God and ask Him to jump in.
07/19/2011
05:55

David Carr
The Colbert ReportS7

David Carr of the New York Times admits that papers sell based on the misery of others, but that Rupert Murdoch's News Corp. sells misery best.
07/19/2011
04:05

Newt's White Whale
The Colbert ReportS7

With his campaign $1 million in debt, Newt Gingrich will have to abandon Moby Dick Airways and travel on Metaphorical Unattainable Goal Bus Lines.
07/19/2011
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