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The Colbert Report
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The Colbert Report
The Word - Eat It
Season 2 • 03/21/2006
Nothing tears Stephen up more than the thought of a sick corporation -- not even "The Natural."
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Watching
07:18
Connie Chung
The Colbert Report
S2
Connie Chung went back to work because her husband, Maury Povich, was sick of her being around the house all the time.
03/20/2006
00:26
Intro - 3/20/06
The Colbert Report
S2
Tonight, Stephen raises the alert from brown to grizzly, Hollywood tries to destroy America and, hopefully, Connie Chung doesn't reveal what keeps romance with Maury alive.
03/20/2006
04:35
Movies That Are Destroying America - Post-Oscar Wrap-Up
The Colbert Report
S2
The pageantry of the Oscars is over, and all we're left with is horrible, horrible movies.
03/20/2006
02:08
The Word - Stop It
The Colbert Report
S2
The vernal equinox was last night, and now even the weariest among us feels a stirring within at the world's rebirth -- which bring us to tonight's word: stop it.
03/20/2006
04:03
War in Iraq - Third Anniversary
The Colbert Report
S2
For the war in Iraq's third anniversary, Stephen thought it would be nice to get a cake in the shape of the prophet Muhammad.
03/20/2006
03:34
World Baseball Classic
The Colbert Report
S2
Japan defeated Cuba 10-6 to win the World Baseball Classic -- we won! U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
03/21/2006
00:26
Intro - 3/21/06
The Colbert Report
S2
Tonight: the early symptoms of mad cow disease, which include short term memory loss, and the early symptoms of mad cow disease, which include short term memory loss.
03/21/2006
05:52
Steve Kroft
The Colbert Report
S2
Does Morley Safer makes Steve Kroft run and get him cigarettes on the set of "60 Minutes"?
03/21/2006
02:09
The In-Box - Corrections
The Colbert Report
S2
Stephen loves getting e-mail from viewers -- even corrections sound like love letters.
03/21/2006
04:39
Employee Performance Reviews
The Colbert Report
S2
Stephen had scheduled employee performance reviews for after the show, but decides to go ahead and conduct them on-air.
03/21/2006
03:12
The Word - Eat It
The Colbert Report
S2
Expensive tests for mad cow disease make corporations sick, and nothing tears Stephen up more than the thought of a sick corporation.
03/21/2006
04:55
Dan Senor
The Colbert Report
S2
Former Coalition Provisional Authority spokesman Dan Senor is conservative on national security but liberal on neckties.
03/22/2006
00:09
Sign Off - Thank You, America
The Colbert Report
S2
Stephen wants to thank America for watching -- not the viewers at home, but the government.
03/22/2006
01:23
Advice for Jennifer Anniston
The Colbert Report
S2
Jennifer Aniston is moving from Hollywood to Chicago, and Stephen has some advice for her: head to the Wiener's Circle at Clark and Wrightwood and get a francheesy.
03/22/2006
07:09
Better Know a District - California's 27th - Brad Sherman
The Colbert Report
S2
Stephen's interview with Representative Brad Sherman, whose district contains a large portion of the porn industry, is interrupted by a pizza delivery guy.
03/22/2006
05:35
The Word - I Am the Great and Powerful Oz
The Colbert Report
S2
By firing teachers who claimed to have credentials they didn't earn, Miami schools are sending their students the wrong message -- don't get caught.
03/22/2006
00:34
Intro - 3/22/06
The Colbert Report
S2
Tonight: Florida teachers take a break from having sex with their students, Stephen explores California's fightin' 27th and the Iraqis are really using their newly-built hospitals.
03/22/2006
01:47
Sign Off - The Reason for the Hearth
The Colbert Report
S2
Stephen knits a scarf for America by the fireside and offers a few words on the meaning of the hearth.
03/23/2006
03:58
Home, Hearth, Heart and Heartland - This Land Is Your Land
The Colbert Report
S2
American values are going right down the toilet -- and not one of those modern, low-flow, sissy toilets, either.
03/23/2006
00:28
Intro - 3/23/06
The Colbert Report
S2
Tonight: Stephen celebrates American values, teaches the White House Press Corps some manners and learns how John Kasich dares call himself Bill O'Reilly's replacement.
03/23/2006
03:38
Stephen's Sound Advice - How to Raise a Hero
The Colbert Report
S2
For parents who want to raise heroes, Stephen has sound advice: men, never cry in front of your kids; women, stay home and home-school the children.
03/23/2006
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