The Colbert Report

Intro - 1/28/09

Season 5 • 01/28/2009

The House passes the $800 billion stimulus plan.

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00:23

1-877-SEAN-930
The Colbert ReportS5

Call 1-877-SEAN-930 if you were offended by anything you heard on tonight's program.
01/26/2009
03:12

Bill O'Reilly Doesn't Report Rumors
The Colbert ReportS5

Bill O'Reilly will not report on rumors of Caroline Kennedy having an affair.
01/27/2009
00:31

Intro - 1/27/09
The Colbert ReportS5

President Obama appears on Arab TV and it's not "CSI: Abu Dhabi."
01/27/2009
02:16

Omar Returns
The Colbert ReportS5

If you love something, set it free from the secret prison under your desk.
01/27/2009
05:17

Cheating Death - Lung Health
The Colbert ReportS5

If air with fewer particles will extend your life for five months, logically air with no particles should extend it indefinitely.
01/27/2009
02:31

Al Arabiya Kidnaps Obama
The Colbert ReportS5

President Obama is held hostage by a terrorist group calling themselves the Al Arabiya television network.
01/27/2009
06:21

Philippe Petit
The Colbert ReportS5

Philippe Petit isn't courageous -- he's following his passion.
01/27/2009
00:22

Call 1-877-SEAN-930
The Colbert ReportS5

If you're offended by Holocaust deniers call 1-877-SEAN-930.
01/28/2009
05:57

Denis Dutton
The Colbert ReportS5

Denis Dutton says art is a tool for propagating.
01/28/2009
05:51

Countdown to Atomic Disaster - The Wing-Ageddon
The Colbert ReportS5

Watching the Super Bowl without a plate of chicken wings is like making love without a plate of chicken wings.
01/28/2009
00:34

Intro - 1/28/09
The Colbert ReportS5

The House passes the $800 billion stimulus plan. China, could we interest you in a slightly used Oregon?
01/28/2009
00:06

Goodnight Illinois Gov. Patrick Quinn
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen says goodnight to Illinois Governor Patrick Quinn.
01/29/2009
00:37

Intro - 1/29/09
The Colbert ReportS5

All 177 House Republicans say no to Obama's stimulus package. Shh! Don't tell them they don't control the House anymore.
01/29/2009
07:07

Sport Report - Chicken Wing Spokesman Richard Lobb
The Colbert ReportS5

Richard Lobb has advice for the man who has to choose between frying chicken wings and educating his kids.
01/29/2009
05:37

John Podesta
The Colbert ReportS5

John Podesta believes that in the last nine days Barack Obama has shown he can make progress.
01/29/2009
01:21

Rod Blagojevich Is Impeached
The Colbert ReportS5

Rod Blagojevich is impeached even after appearing on all the talk shows.
01/29/2009
05:24

The Word - The Audacity of Nope
The Colbert ReportS5

If Republicans can't have a perfect bill to stimulate the economy, they'd rather have no economy at all.
01/29/2009
00:14

So Long, Farewell
The Colbert ReportS5

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night.
02/02/2009
04:02

The Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act
The Colbert ReportS5

Stephen will now have to discriminate under the table, which will be difficult, since that's where he usually does his harassing.
02/02/2009
05:39

Nailed 'Em - Amtrak Photographer
The Colbert ReportS5

Amtrak police arrest a man because he's taking pictures for their photography contest.
02/02/2009
03:05

It Could Be Worse - Iceland
The Colbert ReportS5

Iceland is a frigid rock in the middle of nowhere that has gone bankrupt and gone gay.
02/02/2009
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