The Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert Day

Season 3 • 03/26/2007

God save the queen and Stephen Colbert.

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04:45

Sport Report - NCAA Final Four
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Stephen discusses March Madness and then talks with Coach Mancini of the Saginaw Spirit about the upcoming playoffs.
03/22/2007
00:13

Sign Off - Future
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Stephen encourages his audience to join him for his upcoming show on Monday -- in the future.
03/22/2007
06:29

Katie Couric
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Stephen wonders if Katie Couric would have an easier time delivering the news if she did it as a man.
03/22/2007
04:36

Eleanor Holmes Norton
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Stephen doesn't see why D.C. residents should get a vote in Congress if they could just open a window and yell to have their voices heard.
03/22/2007
02:21

Mummy
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Stephen missed his chance to bid in future auctions with an ancient mummified hand for a paddle.
03/26/2007
02:09

Torture Gonzales
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How dare Chuck Hagel say we're living in a monarchy? The president should confiscate his lands and deny his peerage.
03/26/2007
00:35

Intro - 3/26/07
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In tonight's episode, Stephen talks to John Perry Barlow about digital free speech and brings you highlights from Stephen Colbert Day in Oshawa, Ontario.
03/26/2007
05:20

For Your Editing Pleasure
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Gwen Ifill interviews Stephen, giving everyone a chance to twist his words through editing.
03/26/2007
00:31

Sign Off - Photo-Op
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Don't forget to use the red-eye filter when you take a picture of Stephen.
03/26/2007
05:21

John Perry Barlow
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Stephen draws a chart for John Perry Barlow explaining that you don't bite the hand that feeds you.
03/26/2007
03:48

Stephen Colbert Day
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Oshawa, Ontario celebrates Stephen Colbert Day with a look-a-like contest.
03/26/2007
05:40

James Fallows
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Author James Fallows explains to Stephen the difference between being a children's storybook writer and a strategist for the United States.
03/27/2007
07:26

Madeleine Albright
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Though Stephen is excited for the imminent World War III, Madeleine Albright explains that Armageddon is not exactly a foreign policy.
03/27/2007
03:19

Sean Penn Unleashes on President Bush
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Stephen challenges Sean Penn to a battle of the metaphors after Penn's attack on the president.
03/27/2007
03:25

Tip/Wag - Drug Dealers
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Stephen wags his finger at drug dealers and tips his cap to GLAAD and mansheep.
03/27/2007
00:30

Intro - 3/2707
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Sean Penn insults the president, Stephen asks if we should go to war with Iran, and guest James Fallows discusses what went wrong in Iraq.
03/27/2007
00:13

Sign Off - Going to Bed Angry
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Stephen encourages his audience not to go to bed angry with each other.
03/28/2007
05:44

Jabari Asim
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Stephen suggests blaming the pilgrims for the origin of the "N" Word.
03/28/2007
03:42

Claim to the Arctic
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Since no one yet has territorial claims to the South Pole, Stephen suggests planting an American flag and a Colbert Nation flag.
03/28/2007
03:47

The Word - Monkey Business
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With scientists trying to prove that morality has a biological basis, Stephen thinks it's about time for religion to take things away from science.
03/28/2007
00:33

Intro - 3/28/07
The Colbert ReportS3

Stephen proves that evolution does not exist, says which countries are threatening America, and interviews author Jabari Asim.
03/28/2007
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